Guys, If a girl cancel a date on you because you ignore her for four days and she feels like your using her for sex how would you feel after?

Plus after some thought she decided to come back to you and try things again how would you react?
  • Mad
    Vote A
  • Sad
    Vote B
  • Other
    Vote C
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Most Helpful Guy

  • Well... it just depends on how well you explained it. I would be mad if it was just a random cancel , especially because I am type A. That said, if he understands the thought process and what your concerns were, he should be understanding and respectful of that. If you value the relationship, the thing you must avoid at all costs is making him feel like a child. A lot of a younger guy's self esteem is tied to his girl friend. If he feels like you are trying to be his Mom, he'll leave.

    The question you need to ask is, was your origionAl assumption (that he is using you for sex) correct? The facebook message thing makes me think that you may have been right and he was using you. The key to keeping your relationships safe is to be firm in your decisions and bounderies. If you decide the relationship is going the wrong direction, LEAVE for GOOD.

    Congradulations on getting out of your previous abusive relationship. It takes guts to make that jump, so good job and best wishes!

    • It seems like you understand what I'm saying how am I the controlling one when he read my last message to him before the date and never bother to reply. Then 4 days later I had enough and cancel the date on him and it wasn't like I didn't tell him the truth I told him straight up about why I was piss all I wanted from him was to realize ok that shitty of me of doing that I'm sorry but he never gave me a apologize.

    • When he refused to give me a apologize it reminded me of my ex who never wanted to apologize for his bullshit when I'm always apologizing and I meant all my apologizes. That even piss me off more.

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What Guys Said 4

  • I'd be happy. She just proved to me that she isn't relationship material, but is up for sex. So I'll have sex with her until I find someone I want to have a relationship with.

    Works for me.

    • So her feeling that you don't care for her and she feels like your using her for sex means she shouldn't be in a relationship but the way you handle things (ignoring her for 4 days straight) is fine?

    • Maybe. Sometimes I'm just busy for a few days. There are plenty of valid reasons for being occupied and busy.

      The thing is, I've learnt that women who jumps to conclusions about things that are going on and then takes action to "punish" their partner for whatever crime she assumed that he did, make for very toxic relationships.

      I don't have time for any of that bullshit, so regardless of how or why I was busy, if she stirred up that drama, she's out. Life is much simpler and happier this way.

    • How was I starting up drama? I felt like he wasn't trying to me. Plus I got out a relationship with a guy who treated me horribly I was just trying to protect myself.

  • Well, I wouldn't ignore her for four days in the first place. But if I did, I'd be sad. But that's my own fault for ignoring her. Granted, I need my own time to myself. If she decided to come back, I don't know. I guess it depends on how I'm feeling and if I'm seeing anyone at the time. I suppose I might be willing to give her a chance, but that is quite a questionable "might".

  • If she wants to see whether she can "teach me a lesson," then she's really not leaving me any other choice... other than:

    1. Show her that I'm a good little boy and I will tolerate this behavior going forward and am open to "learning lessons" from mommy or Professor Alwaysright; or,

    2. Show her that I'm a person too, and that her fantasy of being a mommy or teacher with me is something that is unfortunately just a fantasy.

    Now, when faced with that choice, which one do you think a guy is going to pick?

    A guy would have to give that girl the proverbial, "fuck you," the metaphorical finger, and simply continue life without her in his life.

    "Sex was meh/whatever, but that girl has issues with men and she had a controlling personality."

    If a girl wants to control a guy, especially this early in the relationship, only God knows what is to come in the years to come. Fuck that sh*t, not waiting to find out. Abandon the motherf*cking ship!

  • If a girl cancels a date (or does anything else) for no other reason than to 'teach me a lesson' the lesson I learn is to get a new girlfriend. I am not thier child, if I want instructon from them I will ask for it or if they think I need it they can offer it to me like one adult human being to another, not like I am a dog that needs training.

    • But what if she didn't try to teach you a lesson she thought you were just using her for sex and you didn't really care for her since you ignore her for 4 days straight. She also recently got out a horrible relationship months before so she taking everything you do to heart.

    • Well that's a hard call. If she explained I might understand but just cancelling on something she had agreed to seems very much like manipulation.

    • And she try to tell you the real reason through a facebook message and you never bother to read it?

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