So, I've been seeing this guy right now mainly for about a month now, we get along well, share a lot of experiences with one another, we've been intimate, and he's even asked about a relationship. Although I like him and enjoy our time spent together, I just don't feel like committing myself to an exclusive relationship for whatever reason. Mainly because I work all of the time and am actually getting a second job right now to afford my apartment and car I just financed, so there won't be much time for a relationship anyway.
And also, I'm not "crazy" about him like I think I should be. It's just lacking a certain element of excitement for me, being around him. I don't get butterflies when I see him, or any of that stuff that you usually get when you're around someone you really like. At the same time, a guy I used to date casually has been contacting me recently wanting to see me, saying he really wants to make me his girlfriend -- he is really attractive and we connected well, but I couldn't imagine a relationship with him.
Lastly, another guy has been on my mind this entire time, a guy I've dated on and off since last year, and I have strong feelings toward him, but I don't think it's reciprocated. I'm just so torn between having a lack of feelings for someone, too many feelings for someone who likely doesn't share them, and someone who has too many feelings for me that I don't share. What should I do in this situation? I just feel so lost and confused. Maybe I should drop them all and refocus myself on my goals.
- No, that's wrong. You should only devote your attention to one person at a time.Vote A
- Yes, it's normal and healthy to explore other options if you aren't committed yet.Vote B
- Sure, as long as you let them know you are dating other people.Vote C
- Probably not, but as long as you don't tell them, it's fine.Vote D
Most Helpful Guy
Personally I think if you're dating as in serious dating then it's one person right?
If you're just casually meeting people and they are aware of that then it's ok. But if you ask someone out or get asked out then from date 2 onwards it should be clear that it's one on one.
You don't appear to have done wrong though. Respect for admitting your feelings.
Could you check out my question pls? It might help about this friend who seems to be suggestive even though she is taken. It's on my profile page. Would appreciate your thoughts.1
Most Helpful Girl
As long as both guys know that you're not exclusive and there's someone else, I don't see a problem with it. However, you do seem confused about it, and you say that you maybe should take time to focus on your goals. I think that that's what you should do, honestly. You can find someone later when you're ready to be exclusive, or you can go and date later, whatever you want. But get yourself sorted and happy with the rest of your life before you go for a relationship :)2