Does the 30 day no contact rule even work? If so... then what should I do?

Ok... first of all does the 30 day no contact rule even work when trying to re-connect with an ex?

If so... then what should I do? Its actually been over 40 days since I tried talking to her.

We were seeing each other for about 3 months. I know that isn't a long time... but to be honest... Im 39 years old and I find it really hard to meet people (women) in any way shape or form. She is really hot... the best looking girl that I have ever been with... by far. She has a great personality... I enjoyed being with her. When I was dating her... we were a "couple" for about 2 months and then we (to be honest... her) decided we should just be friends. We tried the friend thing (even had one night of romance when we were drunk). But she still insisted we were just "friends." Then we hung out a few times more... and then she finally didn't return the last 2 phone calls I made to her and pretty much blew me off when I said hi to her at the gym. I still see her once in a while at the gym but we do not talk.

Based on what I just said... should I even contact her? I know that my brain is saying no way... but I really want too. We met online and noticed her dating profile is still up and she logged in recently. I've been asking myself why we didn't work out. Aside from her personal issues (she is recenty divorced)... I may have come across at time to be needy and sometimes unconfident in myself. I have... over the last month or so... been trying to better myself... and the time not talking to her... really took a look at why or why not we didn't work out.

What would u do?


Most Helpful Girl

  • That no contact rule is bullshit. And I think you should contact her but maybe take baby steps this time round.

    • What should I say?

    • Start slow by asking her how she is. I'm sure it won't hurt to let her know that you have missed her

Most Helpful Guy

  • First thing slow down. Understand what you looking for here. I don't think she is what you want. Most important quilty to have in a women is caring. That is what you should look for. If you want to just play around then club and bar or whatever enjoy. Couple skill you must have. Know how to dress. I notice that the dress and hair styes effect how people view you. Dress to impress. Know how to flirt and flattery which master. So basicly you don't know what doing. All girl are pretty much the same except some are not looking for anything. You have seperated yourself from the rest of guy.


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What Girls Said 1

  • Honestly I think you should let her go. She decided to put you in the friends zone. Whether she was the hottest person in the world or just an average woman you want someone who wants to spend time with you as much as you want to spend time with them. I think that you are holding onto her because of her looks because in your words with you said she's the hottest girl you have ever been with. You are ignoring your head telling you that you guys lacked a deeper connection. Attraction is important but shouldn't be the basis of your relationship. When your 90 do u want someone by your side you are just with bc they we're hot or someone who will bring you soup because they have a deep appreciation for you? Best of luck. I hope u find love


What Guys Said 1

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