Guys, Why am I so undateable?

I've never had a single long relationship. In fact guys I've loved have only ever been friends with benefits. Long term friends with benefits.

so here are the negatives about me:

1. I'm overweight - not grossly fat, just overweight. But I exercise daily and have overhauled my diet.
2. I have crooked front teeth. I can't afford to fix them. They aren't super ugly but they're noticeable.
3. I wear glasses, but frameless light ones.

now here are the positives:

1. I dress nicely for my figure, coloring and style.
2. I'm pretty. Like when I get dressed up guys stop and stare.
3. I'm direct and speak clearly About a number of topics.
4. I'm polite and well mannered.
5. I'm a damn good cook.
6. I'm smart.
7. I'm great with kids.
8. Im hardworking.
9. I can run a household well.

i know it sounds like I'm tooting my own horn here (heh heh) but frankly I need to get this out there. I'm so sad about this. and please guys, be gentle. I get hurt very easily.


Most Helpful Guy

  • I think the answer is very simple, you are looking for the wrong type of guys. I know im not bad looking and i do get female attention , but I've happened to meet the wrong type of girls for the last year alone i dated 3 girls, 1 was pregnant from me but left me after miscarriage, another one we just made out and had 3 dates but she couldnt get over her abusive ex boyfriend, then the mother of this 2nd girl started flirting with me but she was a married woman, her marriage ended and she left with a different guy. then the 3rd girl came along and we seem to have shared a lot of things, she was a beautifull girl but i found out rather soon that she was a paranoid girl who has done nothing but treatng me like shit for those 5 weeks. Now i have a girlfriend, i really like and i just feel at place with her. i feel like i can be, just a loving, friendly person with a touch of romance. those other 4 woman turned me into a depressed person, with anger controll issues, i do sometimes still rage when im driving or so, or lose my temper but due to my new girlfriend i feel that im becoming less angry. so in your case, maybe change your standards, just having sex is boring, when there is no passion or love behind it.

    • Maybe you're right... :( but it's hard isn't it? Wasn't it?

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    • Thank you - your story is so inspiring.

    • thank you. you see sometimes its not other people who let us down the most, but we ourselves. The way you describe yourself, there is definitely a mr. right out there for you ! and if you have guy who is interested in you but he doesn't take the first step, maybe you should, and its not difficult, just be like, ey, wanna grab a coffee with me somewhere, or having lunch. it's a great setting to get to know someone. be flirty, and fun. i used to be like that as well, shy and stuff, till i saw this good looking girl a few years ago while on holiday in the czech republic. she was a tour guide in a old castle. so when i walked out i gave her a friendly smile. i told my brother , i wished i had her number. he was like, dude get back, and just ask her. so after 5 minutes, i just said to myself. f. ck it. i went inside, asked her number and she was like, and what if i won't give it to you. i responded with a joke, she gave her number, we had 2 dates, and made out. still have her on fb. u can do it

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What Guys Said 4

  • Maybe you are a little insecure and sending out those vibes or maybe you are just afraid to put yourself out there and show your interest in a romantic, I wanna be in a relationship way.

    I don't see crooked front teeth as an issue or glasses, which I personally like. The overweight thing is not something I would be attracted to, but I really doubt this is what's going on cause I see a lot of really overweight people in ltr's, not even just a little overweight.

    • I have actually been told that I don't step out of my comfort zone. From a guy I know is attracted to me but doesn't make the first move. It's been a bit of a game, like neither of us willing to crack. Any tips on how to step out?

    • I think your positive attributes are all good things and different ones will appeal to different guys, but they have to get to know you. You are pretty... that will get them looking as you already pointed out but it's the other 8 things that are going to keep them interested for longer than the first two or three dates.

      You just gotta be open and be willing to share some of those other qualities and be interested in the guy. You can be pretty and all of these things but that isn't necessarily going to get a guy to move. If he is attracted to you and you are sending confusing signals, he may take it as "i'm just not interested, I got other things to do" from you. You may need to step out and make a first move, his interest hasn't changed it's just his perception of your interest has, so you can try flirting a little bit, or you can just get to the point and ask him to go to a movie or something along those lines.

  • honestly I think the overweight factor is the only thing holding most guys back. actually fuck that. I don't know. you just haven't met the right guy yet. sure you seem to have a lot of pros to you but they have to be attractive to the guy for him to meet you halfway at least. like he has to be into them.

    • Yes it seems my pros aren't really pros after all

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    • I see. I do a lot of volunteer work. But no, I'm not confident. And I doubt I'll reach that point in this lifetime

    • you never know, just keep trying.

  • According to me dear all things of our personality plays a big role you can connect me on fb "lovejeet bding"to know how to well dress and what type of body figure you have to discover

  • I will put this gently you are simply not to most men's preferences. Just as equally as you might want a tall man, he wants a beautiful woman. What are your standards for dating men?

    • Um - that he likes laughing, food and has sex arms and eyes...

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    • No, because the vast majority of women say the same thing. You are literally average. I see this all of the time on online dating profiles.

    • I see. I would like to leave you with this: when people ask for you to not be cruel and needlessly brutally honest, there may actually be a reason for it that even anonymously they can't share. Depression and suicide triggers do exist. I can stomach it. The next poor soul to 'benefit' from your brutality might not.

      I wish you a good life and good luck with your online dating life.

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