Did My Lesbian Friend Ask Me Out or Diss Me? Advice please?

My friend, Jess, is a lesbian, I'm female and bi. Back in June she asked me out over a text, and even though I had a crush on her and think she's cute, but I turned her down since it felt like she was still getting over her breakup with her ex who cheated on her - even though she denies it. Like she literally asked me 'do you have a boyfriend or gf? I don't like being single :(" Which felt a bit fake to me, and made me wonder why not ask me out because you 'like' me? -_-

Anyway, a few weeks ago she was looking for someone to see the Attack on Titan movie with, and randomly asked me if I wanted to see it with her. I said "of course!" and made her pinky swear that we'd see it. (She's a flaky person and has cancelled plans on me and my sister a few times this summer). It's a special screening with limited tickets that you can pre-order.

I fb msged Jess all the deets, she wrote me this:

"OK, it's a date. ;) JK no date LOL"

I don't know how to respond. I'm thinking of telling her I'm inviting my sister to come with us in that case tho lol


Most Helpful Guy

  • Maybe she's saying "don't worry about me im not thinking of this as a date so it's ok for you to go with me" ie she thinks you are not into her that way and doesn't want you to worry about it

    • thanks for your reply. makes me a little sad tho since i wouldn't mind a date with her haha
      I already wrote her back with this message "LOL I'll see you then for our non date haha" Did I just eff up any chance I had? :(

    • nevermind i erased that message and sent her a new one saying "damn, i was hoping you'd pay for my popcorn and shit XD jkjk see you then" That ok?

    • I'd say you haven't messed up anything but your going to have to be a little more direct

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What Guys Said 2

  • I suspect she is hedging her bets in case you dont like her the same way.

    • thanks for your answer, but I don't know how to respond now :s
      should i jokingly say that i'm bringing my sister then i dunno lol

    • well depends on how dom you want to be... you can say.. "no... its a date i said so." or you can just play it cool and say "See you then..." and leave what you mean hanging.

  • It sounds like her brother is getting her phone and messaging you. Ask her in person about it.


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