On a scale from 1-10 how big of a dick does this situation [and this situation alone] make me?

I started chatting with a girl online today that I've been wanting to talk to for about a year and she changed her profile enough that I was able to get a good few messages in, get her number, and she's planning to make plans with me eventually. Turns out that she's been seeing a guy, they've been acting like a couple, and that she found out that he's been talking to girls on the same site and he says they haven't been dating. I will, and this is not just some hope or anything, I will take her from him and I will keep her. I won't make any official moves until it's actually over but I'm going to get her and keep her. The reason I'm so sure of this is because I've taken girls from abusive relationships before, a couple times; for some reason I'm good at getting women who should not be available. This is not a skill I use often and I definitely don't do it if the guy seems like a stand up guy and is doing what he can for her regardless of if it is enough for her or not; There are only specific times that I will use it and they generally require the girl to really need to get out of the relationship and have some protection from the guy. I'm no whitenight but you don't fuck with people, you sure as fuck don't fuck with people that I like or care about in any way, shape, or form because I will make you understand your place.

But validation aside, how big of a dick does this situation make me?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Well, i'd rate you as like an 8 or a 9 on the dick scale because you have no problem breaking your own rules and then are pretty good about rationalizing why it's ok.

    • Explain to me how I'm breaking my rules? He's trying to cheat on her and they're not even dating in his mind and words.

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    • She did, until today, think they were dating. She doesn't know right now and isn't looking for anything other than to just talk to people. But I know for sure, that I'm the first guy to get her number, she didn't even have to say it; it's just one of those things. I'm all cool for just talking but it's kind of a grey area situation in my mind. One of those "who fucking knows" moments.

    • So really it's all about perspective here. You can easily change the question in your mind cause even you are harboring some doubts which is actually a good thing for you.

      But you can say "am I a dick for talking to a girl that was interested in a guy that was dating other girls and hurt her feelings because she wanted it to be a relationship"

      It removes the assumption that there was cheating, which in turn implies there was an exclusive relationship and also you are not actually taking her away from him cause he doesn't have her. In this case, her wanting an exclusive relationship doesn't mean there is one. It's irrelevant that the guy said they weren't dating because really they weren't in an exclusive relationship anyway, it just makes him a liar. When you look at it from that point of view, then in fact you are not a dick at all, you are just being respectful of her space and allowing her time to come to terms with what she wants to do.

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