Girls, On Online dating what will get a response from you?

I mean i am not rude, vulgar, full on or nothing when messaging girls but very rarely do they respond -

I just feel a bit fed up to be honest i can't see where i am going wrong so do you have any tips, suggetsions to at least get response as a lot of these women view my profile then don't respond back?


Most Helpful Girl

  • When I was on POF, I had a few baseline requirements:
    (1) His profile and his message to me had taken some effort. I know putting effort into writing a woman seems like a waste when most women still don't respond - I'm sympahetic to that complaint, but I don't feel personally responsible to spend my time fixing it. If a guy wrote "Hey" or "check out my profile" I clicked delete. If I guy wrote "I saw you're into stargazing - do you ever go to Stellatane?" now I know not only did he take the time to read my profile, but he knows something about one of my interests, and that guy I was definitely going to write back, even it if was to say thanks but no thanks.
    (2) Age and smoking. I'm totally shallow and inflexible here. I won't date anyone closer in age to my dad than to me, I won't date anyone young enough to be my child, and I won't risk falling in love with a smoker.
    (3) No whining. The guys who actually write that women never write them back or who accuse me of probably not being interested because I'm taller or he's not wealthy or whatever bullshit - they're right, I'm not interested.

    But even given these baselines, the simple truth is women get lots of messages and we don't have time to go out with every guy who seems reasonably attractive on the website - it's just a numbers game. The guys with whom I actually engaged in repeated messaging and went out with were men who had something in common with me (their profiles or messages had to be specific enough that I could tell); they were guys who gave me the impression that they were being honest (first whiff of a lie and I'm out) and weren't going to rush for sex; and they were guys who said something that made me laugh or piqued my curiosity.

    On your profile in particular, you took the time to write something that sounds sincere, but it also sounds like something almost every other man in the world could have said, so a woman has no sense of who you are from it. EVERYBODY enjoys socializing with his friends - that's what makes them friends (and you misspelled quiet). Far more interesting would be to say "there's nothing I enjoy more with my friends than an evening on the beach making up songs as the crabs scuttle around." Almost everyone values what he's studying and his family and... Better to tell us what you're studying and what you love about it or a story of how you're the middle child and had to work for your parents' attention and that's why you're so close to your siblings.


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What Girls Said 2

  • just give it time.

  • Ask original questions and be interesting. Girls get "Hi, you're pretty" messages more often than not. Such responses fall into the "boring" category.


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