Does he just want to sleep with me?

I meet this guy two years ago while I was on a trip in his city. We got along really well, but because I live 4 hours away we didn't talk much after. About 2 months ago I was there again and we hung out for a few days. I'm there this week for work, so we've been spending more time together. We haven't had sex, but he's made it clear he wants to but he said only if I'm ready. He said I'm giving him mixed signals and wanted to know if I'm using him because I don't know anyone else there or if I like him. He asked if he could pursue me if my job transfers me to his area, but I'm just worried this will change if I sleep with him. He said we could take a step back and be friends if that's what I want, but that he's so interested it would be hard for him. Am I reading too far into this or is he just telling me what I want to hear? When I'm with him he treats me really well, takes me out, and is very affectionate, but when we're apart we don't talk very often.


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What Guys Said 1

  • He definitely wants to sleep with you, I can assure you of that. It doesn't seem like it's his endgame though. And yeah, it probably would fuck up any sort of future chances with him if you bent over for him.

    Honestly, the guy sounds a bit desperate to me and is probably in a dry spell. He seems like the type of guy that will wait on a particular girl forever, nice guy but probably not the most interesting or fun after a while of getting to know him. If you really like the dude all the same and have some sort of notion that he isn't going to wait for you without some sort of action, maybe just make a compromise by giving him a blowjob. The problem with that is that he'll try to get more so you have to be pretty firm with your boundaries and hold your own horniness at bay. Can you do that? Just a blowjob would leave him wanting the grand slam without getting it so he'd still be in the pursuit that he's in.

    My guess is that you'll find someone else when you go back to your city though. That is what usually happens when guys wait for girls. Another guy comes in and steals her before the original guy gets any chance. It's the reason why I only give her 2 dates, 3 dates max to put out. This guy has already given you a lot of time though and he's hooked on you. The real mistake he made was to spell things out and be boring/predictable about telling you his feelings. If you show your hand too soon, you always lose.

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What Girls Said 1

  • He wouldn't refuse

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