Is it worth it to give someone a second chance?

About 3 months ago my boyfriend who was my very first boyfriend broke up with me. His reason was because he felt we rushed into the relationship and he didn't know me very well.(which could have easily been fixed if he just asked more questions about me) In total our relationship was only three months long. We are still friends and recently he told me that letting me go was the biggest mistake he made. He knows he was an asshole for breaking up with me with a weak excuse. He continues to tell me how he wish he could have a second chance but he knows he doesn't deserve it.

I still have feelings for him a bit. When I didn't see him over the summer I thought I was over him but when I saw him again it was a rush of memories. It hurt to see him with another girlfriend. Seeing them do things we use to do together. I feel like a bitch but when they broke up after a month of dating I was kinda happy because he deserved better (they broke up because she was clingy, gave him no privacy about the relationship like telling everyone how big his dick is as well as she didn't even have a direction in life or have any goals)

If I were to give him a second chance it wouldn't be right away. I would probably want to be friends for at least a year to make sure he is going to be serious this time. My friends all think he doesn't deserve a second chance. He didn't fuck up like cheat on me though, all he did wrong was break up with me impulsively. He even wears the friendship bracelet I made him for his birthday and gave it to him the day we broke up since his birthday was in a few days. I can't help but love that he started wearing it.

What do you guys think? Does he deserve a second chance or should we only be friends and nothing more?

Has anyone given a S/O a second chance before? Do you regret it? Or are you happy you gave them that second chance?


Most Helpful Guy

  • I don't believe in second chances, I don't ask for them either. Get it right and put in the effort the first time around.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Some people deserve second chances.
    The ball is in your court now.
    I advise you to take it slow (like you plan to). He has to sort of win you back.
    He can't expect to say, "I want you back" and for you to be there in the blink of an eye.
    I think you should go for it!
    There's always potential.

    • Have you ever given a S/O a second chance before?

    • A long while back I wanted to (the guy who I thought was my 1st love).
      A year after our break up I confessed my feelings.
      He then responded, "We can be friends with benefits or nothing else".
      I was hurt and devastated but I knew my worth and that I would never settle , so I told him "nothing else... and walked away".
      Months later... he confessed the truth that he had feelings for me too.
      But by that time, I was way over him!

    • Awww I'm sorry to hear that :( it sounds like you made the right choice though. Never just settle for friends with benefits.

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • Nope. If you break up, run.

  • Yes just like you said, be friends before moving on. Better make him feel like you own him, if he doesn't fail you go for it.


What Girls Said 3

  • I do not believe in second chance. BUT for you if you believe in him; if you can really say he tries; then give him.
    Make him understand ; this is the second and the last chance.

  • I've done it and regretted it because we never worked through our issues, so they just came up again. And while I personally don't have that kind of trust to dish out second chances, that doesn't mean they can't work. I think time is everything. If it's only been a few months, I don't think he's learned much. But give it a year or so, and there may be a chance. Just be open about how you feel about the situation. Communication is everything. And take it slow. He needs to make a serious effort to mend fences. Good luck!

  • I didn't even need to read that, the answer is NO

    • Have you ever given a S/O a second chance before?

    • Show All
    • He's a good guy and I want him back but the fact that there is a risk of losing him again that makes me hesitate. I can't get him od my mind because he is so sweet to me. He really does want to win me back by the amount of effort he's putting in. Thanks for your input :) I know that I know him better then you or my friends but I'm just worried I'm blinded by old memories. Fresh eyes can see what I can't.

    • No I know, I just didn't wonna give you terrible advice when good guys dont come by so easily