How do I be the one who cares less?

I feel that whenever I care too much for my boyfriend, aka I reply his texts instantly, I hug him and touch him all the time, I have sex with him whenever he wants... he seems more distant, aka he stops texting me good night, he doesn't reply my texts until 5 hours later, he is less touchy-feely.

Yes, it could be all in my imagination, and yes, he could have other things on his mind like schoolwork... but it is also true that when I care less aka I don't reply him so quickly, I pull back a little when we hang out... etc, he becomes more affectionate and less distant.

Also, I am worried he is thinking of breaking up with me.

In short, how do I care less about my boyfriend? I want to protect myself/hold back a little in case he does decide to break up with me. How do I stop wondering what he's doing, why he isn't replying my texts and what he's thinking about me? I hate this feeling, really.

Help please!


Most Helpful Guy

  • Just don't care that much. You could stop writing such long essays about it for example. There are other guys in this word so keep your options up so that you can easily have a new relationship when your boyfriend leaves (doesn't mean that you should flirt with other guys or cheat on your boyfriend just befriend with some guys) or just mirror his behavior but I think this stuff is childish just talk with him


Most Helpful Girl

  • Meh, be aware of what you say and do.

    ''Why didn’t you call when you got off work?'' ''Where were you last night? You didn’t answer my text right away.'' ''Let me know when you get home so I know you’re safe.'' It’s the little sentences we drop that can scream loud messages to guys; in this case, ''I’m your mom and you need to let me know your whereabouts at all times, mister.''

    Pay attention to the message you’re sending with your offhand comments, and you might be able to avoid communicating that you’re needy and uptight if you’re truly not.

    Good luck.


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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 1

  • Don't play games. Personally, I don't like the phrase "Caring less"... to me it means the relationship doesn't have the value it should.

    Just be you and do what you do. BUT, if just being you means you are overbearing, nagging, questioning him all the time, checking your phone every 2 minutes, then that needs to stop. Your phone isn't glued to your hand, or your hip for that matter, so put it down and DO STUFF! Whatever it is you need to be dong at that moment, just focus on it! Missing a call here and there, and not responding to every text right away because you are genuinely involved in something else at that moment is OK! But don't intentionally ignore him just so you appear busy - that's playing games.

    It's more about WORRYING less than it is about CARING less. Besides, if he doesn't like who you really are, then why are you with him?

    • I don't like playing games too, but it really sucks when I'm so into him and it seems he's like "Uhh... okay". So I tone it right down and he's all good. But it's so difficult to tone it down cause I really like him. I guess this is what I mean by "caring less".

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