Girls, WHY DO FRIENDS DISAPPEAR WHEN THEY GET INTO A RELATIONSHIP? Please help me understand this and listen to my rant, ladies?

I need to rant a bit and then you can critique what I'm ranting about and tell me wether it's relevant or not. I don't understand why some girls totally go MIA when they get into a relationship. I don't fucking get it. I have a boyfriend myself but I will ALWAYS make time for my friends! I love my boyfriend but we all need girls nights once in a while. My friend had been in a relationship with an asshole boyfriend for two years and this year is the worst. We only hangout when we go to our guys games. She'll either cancel plans on me or never attempt to make them at all and I am over it. Ladies, do you feel this way or am I just being a bitch? I don't understand why my friends just disappear when they get into relationships. I understand spending time with your partner, I do, but is a girls night out once a month really that hard to do?


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What Girls Said 2

  • I'm not really sure why some girls do that 24/7. I've lost a friend or two to that very cause, usually when the guy was an abusive, manipulative little shit too.

    Probably a combination of the girl being blindly in 'love' with the guy, so much so that she makes it her own personal mission (subconsciously) to fix him. To get him to see the light and turn him into the perfect boyfriend who will treat her right.

    I have done that a few times. Okay maybe more than a few, turned down hangouts with friends to be with my boyfriend instead. In all fairness though, that'd only be if I already saw said friends earlier that week and regularly would see them after. I think after people get into a relationship, for some that will now take precedence over anything else in their social life. You just get a lot more invested in a s/o than friends. You've only got one boyfriend, several friends. So if you invest more into the former, you've got a better chance of cutting any potential losses.

  • People in our age range have their own lives going on (work, school, etc.), so they could just be busy and want to relax with their boyfriend after a long day. Months tend to fly by when you have a lot going on.

    I agree that in order to keep friendships strong, people should make the time to hang out every so often. Canceling plans all the time isn't cool at all; this is actually a huge pet peeve of mine, unless the person has a genuine reason. Just last week a friend of mine cancelled a half hour before meeting up, after I had already gotten ready and stuff. :/

    Do you think your friend's "asshole" boyfriend is preventing her from seeing friends often? Maybe there is more going on... Who knows.

    Also, maybe you and some of your friends are just growing apart. It's sad but it happens.