Girls, Can you help me with this?

For a few months now I have been reaching out to a girl, helping her with her issues and problems, standing up for her and giving her advice and building her up, because she had a very low self esteem. So she and I kept talking from dawn to dusk, and we became good friends and then things escalated to flirting, sharing secrets 'joking' about married life together and starting a family etc. and so I knew all this time that there was something between us, and I think she noticed it too because we kept sending each other 'signals' but never thought much about it. And then suddenly we were talking and joking one day and then unexpectedly she told me that we both know there is something that is more than friends between us, and then my heart leaped with joy and I immediately agreed. But when I told her I was enjoying it (as an attempt to woo her), things started to go awry! And then she started getting curtly and I knew something was up, and believe me I tried asking, but she kept on saying that she's fine and that nothing is the matter, and so I decided not to bug her about it anymore and changed the subject to try and see if it lifts her spirits, but the curtness continued and I left her alone for a while and then she messaged me saying: "I'm Depro..." and when I tried asking what the matter was, she wouldn't talk to me about it (which she usually does). And now I'm left with my hands in my hair. What should I do?


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • ... Helping her with her issues and problems...
    On top of everything else she is probably going through, although I am not so sure you know Everything about her condition, she is now confused and is having a hard time in dealing with the reeling of this feeling and the fact That... Then my heart leaped with joy and I immediately agreed.
    Let her go for awhile and take in what is going on between you. It was a lot to learn, a lot to say that day and with your own reaction it became a Hay day and something she needs time to absorb.
    I am sure she will be back and when she does, tell her "Let's go slow now so we both can nurse and nurture something special here, dear."
    It's very hard to be in a relationship with someone who has problems. Your patience may or may not pay off, it is a gamble. If she is not seeing a professional, she most likely should, and if she Is, it is going to be a long haul, as you have already seen.
    Good luck. xx

  • This is sad, man. I sincerely don't know what to do in this situations, since I never had to deal with depression in other people. I don't think she got scared of a relationship, I just think she is scared o being heartbroken, which is usually a common fear when in a relationship or before we start one. You should show her your support, be there for her, and smoothly persist with the dating idea after she calms down a bit.