Was he in denial when he said he wasn't looking for a relationship (Sorry, LONG)?

I was seeing a guy casually for a year, let's call him Jake. For this year I was between Jake and my ex because Jake had made it clear on PLENTY of occasions he did not want anything serious. I also didn't want anything serious (I am much older than him) and expressed this in multiple conversations and was trying to work things out with my ex. We were basically each others' glorified booty calls that came with great conversation and laughs. Things got serious for about 2 1/2 months when my ex went away for 3 months. I broke it off temporarily with my ex, and basically spent every day sleeping over at Jake's (I pretty much lived there, and I would never stay the night before). I had told Jake repeatedly NOT to introduce me to his friends or family since we were no more than a casual thing. However, for those 2 1/2 months he introduced me to practically his whole crew on a number of different occasions (including his sister in law), claiming that he told them I was a girl he was seeing when I asked how he told them who I was. I brushed it off as him showing me off as a trophy. Right before my ex returned Jake decided out of nowhere to go away for the summer, no warning, nothing. Literally told me the day before. I told Jake I was probably going to try working things out with my ex again while he was gone.

We had sporadic contact while he was gone, talked a few times on the phone (which is rare since we only text each other). We never say mushy things, so there was no 'I miss you' or anything like that. He told me about a few of the girls he hooked up with while he was gone, knowing that did not bother me but I feel like he wanted it to. Anyways, I ended up getting engaged to my ex and didn't tell Jake until after he returned. We had sex right before I told him, and afterwards he was shocked. Asked to see the ring, pictures, whole nine yards so that he could 'make it real' for himself. Tell you the truth I liked the guy but I knew it wouldn't go anywhere so

I never let myself like him as much as I could have. Anyways, I posted a pic of my now fiancée and myself and he blocked me. I didn't think it was necessary considering we don't have mutual friends or each other ad friends on FB. I haven't' spoken to him in 4 weeks. I accidentally called him, and he didn't follow up to see if I meant to speak with him. It would have been nice to be friends but maybe impossible since we are attracted to each other.


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What Guys Said 1

  • My question is if you're engaged then why do you care about anything about him? Getting engaged to an ex isn't a good idea. You're settling


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