Is this girl getting taken advantage of?

I've known this girls since February (I'm now a senior and she's a junior) let's call her Emily. she's a really sweet, innocent, and cute girl, super smart we go to one of tge best high schools in the country. Emily and I talked a lot for the first couple months and then we stopped talking because I didn't get a sheet for service hours that I needed. although she did eventually gave it. In the summer we didn't talk although I did tell her to hang out but she either didn't want to or she had a valid reason (it was something like her dad didn't let her and she got sick). I started school about a 2 months ago and we started talking a bit more than last school year. She started acting strange these past few weeks and bringing up how her grades are falling and her family issues at home, then a couple days ago she tells me that she's "kinda" together with this guy who I met once because I was at the library with her for her homework which wasn't planned and really whenever we do hang out its never planned, and while we were at the library there was a creepy old guy following her and I was comforting her and then the other guy came to the library and we all walked away to walk her home and he just said that the creep guy was probably mentally ill or slow really didn't show any concern. And he didn't bother walking her in front of her home but I did because I wanted her to feel safe and make sure she got home safe. (I've noticed she happens to place herself in front of me when I'm in my neighborhood when we go home because we live in the same neighborhood and I did move out of the city I still hang out in my old hood). So she told me before that her friend ( that guy) gives her rides from school to her home. She also played him $40 and I questioned it in my mind I didn't say anything because I see her quite a lot on the bus and train. She also has been really down and blue when she is usually jolly and happy. When she brought up she's "kinda" with that guy who is 20.

I was really upset when she told me that she's "kinda together" with that guy because I really liked her but is she asking for help? She really doesn't know how to express herself and is inexperienced and naive. Im not saying I know everything but I know enough about the world to know how people are and for a grown 20 year old to go after a 16 year old and tell her that he knows people are going to judge her , it shows how he knows what he's doing and is fully aware of how high school girls are.
Should I help her or not? If so why and what are my goals, intentions, I'm not trying to be in the friend zone and I'm ready to move on but I'm not sure if I can knowing I should've told her something if she's brought up her issues to me. Thanks for any help


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  • No, she is not taken advantage of. You just want an excuse to try to break them up because you like her. Although I do agree that the age difference is too big.

    • she brought up issues that she is now failing her classes and has home issues as well as her friends looking down upon her being " kinda together " with that dude. She told me that the guy told her people are going to judge them and to ignore them and its all about perspective. I mean she said she's known the guy for 8 years but how Mature is he to actually charge a high school girl for gas money and he is at a different development stage in His life than she is, she hasn't graduated high school whereas he already has his own car and i don't know, its bothering the fact that he isn't with a girl around his age. He knows what he's doing obviously, but I don't want to see her get taken advantage of , and I'm tired of seeing her struggle right now in her life telling about her issues whereas before she was more happy and positive. Now she's very down and I honestly believe that the guy saw she's vulnerable and took action.

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    • He doesn't drive her home everyday after school, thats why she brought this up to me. I take the bus and train with her and we get off at the same stops and its never planned when we see each other, its just happens to occur that way and when she first told me she payed him the money I was really thinking like 1. where did u get the money because she doesn't work and most likely gave her allowance to him 2. he doesn't even pick u up everyday and I've only seen him twice pick her up and that is not $40 worth not even a weeks worth of gas money. I didn't bring it up to her because I was really stunned that this guy who is 20 and fully aware and more developed than her and is doing this to her. I mean I have told my closest guy friend who doesn't go to my school anymore (bexuae I knew he wouldn't be able to tell anyone from my school) and he said that for me to talk to her normally and if she brings it up talk to her about it and that's it. Afterward I'm not so sure what will happen.

    • If I do end up talking to her about it, I mean her friends look down upon the guy already and she implied that her family found out and are upset. I dont want her to look at me like I'm everybody else and judge her because her friends and whoever is trash talking about her is failing to recognize that she is going to make mistakes and rather than accepting it and helping her, they are doing the opposite and judging her.

  • She played him 40 dollars?

    • Payed*

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    • Well she sounds like she really will be making her own mistakes and you can't help her make better grades and choices. You can try but it may just hurt you in the long run.

    • Why though? I'm not trying to help her getting better grades or choices I'm trying to help her if she needs it, this isn't the typical a girl got with a dude and I move on. This is a more severe situation and I'm not sure on what'll will happen if I do or dont say anything. if I do help her if she asks for it, should my goal be to get with her and prove that the other guys a douche or not? It really depends on her and me but I guess that's the risk I'll take