I'm torn between staying close to him in NH or moving back home to be closer to family. I've been away from them for over 4 years and really miss them. I'm also battling depression and sucidal thoughts as my extra semester of schooling in NH has me alone as everyone I know has graduated and my boyfriend lives an hour away- only able to see him twice a week if I'm lucky.
He's told me on multiple occasions that he doesn't think long distance can work and any more than 4 months long distance he considers impossible and not worth it. I've asked him what if I had to take a job that was near the school or near boston (2hours away). Would he move in with me or would he stay with his mom.. his answer was to get defensive about his mom and then he proceeded to tell me that an hour away is a long commute and it'd be better for me to communte than him because I'd have the higher paying job. So he thinks I should move to town nearby his work instead. Meaning I'd either be living alone again or commuting hour plus to work every morning. Plus I HATE Boston.
I can't help feeling that I could find better jobs for myself, and higher pay if I were to look back in my hometown. There's really not a whole ton in NH and I've already applied for 20-30 jobs in the area and have been denied. Plus I feel like i'm putting my life on hold for 2 and half years until he's done and I'm free to find a job that I have more of a passion for. I'm worried I'll get too comfortable to leave and will fore