How can I stop being so selfish and entitled?

I flirted with the line of love ( for 5 months) with a guy who had a girlfriend. I understand that there is a part that we both played in doing wrong. We had an emotional affair, he confided in me for emotional desires and his girlfriend for sexual desires. his girlfriend is a freak (sexually) she is not the smartest apple on the tree and she is very mean, she is the typical pretty mean girl with the hottest nicest boyfriend in high school (she has a nasty attitude nd is kinda a bully) I am the exact opposite, I hate arguing, I am very in touch with my feelings/poetic, im in the top 5%, easy going and very funny. I thought that because his girlfriend was such a bitch, that my actions were justified coming in between them. It just dawned on me today that I am selfish and an entitled girl. I have been depressed for a large part of my life due to a tragic event with my father ( after he went to prison when I was 8) I felt like the entire world was against me, and for a while I was completely convinced that it was, because of all of the horrible things have happened to 8 year old me and my struggles w my self-esteem, body issues, my history w self harm nd a suicide attempt (when I was 13). I thought that I deserved my perfect dream guy... even if he was taken I was willing to make him available for my own happiness. And even though his girlfriend is very rude, I am not a spiteful person, I could never be as mean as she is because thats not who I am. How can I stop being so selfish and entitled. How can I have more sympathy for other people Nd not think of myself as a victim?
* ( after he went to prison when I was 8 yeara old)


Most Helpful Girl

  • The quickest way to overcome being selfish and entitled is to find a wonderful guy you love and adore, only to have another girl disrespect you and your relationship by luring him away from you, emotionally. However, you seem to understand your faults and shortcomings, and seem to genuinely want to change your behavior; and to do that, you really must give him up entirely. Butt out of their relationship, do not answer his texts. Whatever has happened to you in the past has no bearing on your choices now, or in the future. You DO know right from wrong, so take the moral high ground from this point, on. You wouldn't want a guy that is committed to someone else, but cheats with you... or vice-versa. And to be honest,16 is REALLY YOUNG to be worried about these things! You should be enjoying your independence, now... worry about relationship stuff after high school, when there will be so much more time for that.

    You seem unusually smart, self-aware, and highly evolved for a girl of your age. I have little doubt that your life will turn out just fine. :)


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