Girls, What if I never find my perfect girl and am I doomed for being shy?

Hi I'm a freshmen in college. I'm also 18 years. old and gonna be 19 in 2 months. My life has been hard on me because I had my first girlfriend and she broke up with me because of distance and I know there's no way for me to get her back because it'll be pointless. I've been depressed lately and I've been listening to sad piano music and it mad me cry a little twice because of my depression and knowing how I could never find the right girl for me. I'm shy and this is what's keeping me from doing anything with girls and people can say whatever they want like "Girls love shy guys" but where are those girls because I haven't seen any that like those types. I play the piano/organ and passionate about my music, I workout, and I'm sweet. But I have no confidence whatsoever and yeah confidence is like the #1 thing to get girls but I can't genuinely get it because of my shyness and sometimes I wanted to commit suicide because of it. I just want a girl that likes music as much as i do and appreciate me for playing the piano/organ and is does workout a little and treat my sweetness as being weak because nowadays girls like douchebags a lot. When I see other people happy in their relationship it makes me feel like I'll never have that and i'll always be miserable. Am I doomed of finding a girl for me because of my social anxiety and shyness? I really need help. Thanks.


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