This guy that I have been seeing is avoiding me since he lost his job 2 weeks ago. My friends all say to ditch him, but I like him. What should I do?

I've been seeing this guy for about 5 months now and things have been going fairly well except we've been taking things slow because he made a career change and he was trying to focus on his career. He has repeatedly made statements that his life is a mess and he's trying to get his life together (because of circumstances that occurred in the past couple of years that I won't get into) so I was okay with taking things slow because I really like him.

Two weeks ago he lost his job and I don't really know why. I think he just wasn't doing too well in this new field. He seems a bit depressed about it and has been avoiding me. Everyday I'll call him to ask him if he's doing ok and he kind of just brushes me off, and when I text him he won't respond anymore.

Should I just give him his space? Do you think this is over and I should just walk away? I like him a lot so the thought of giving up makes me sad.

My girlfriends are all telling me to just forget about him. They said he's a loser who can't hold a stable job and that a man in his 30's should have his career figured out. they also said I always take too long to realize a guy isn't good for me and it's about time I let this one go and that I need to learn to cut guys off right away and not give them so many chances.

Are they right? Should I Just forget about him and tell him I'm done? Should I wait it out? I really don't know what to do.


Most Helpful Guy

  • No one else should be telling you what to do with your life. It sounds like your boyfriend is depressed and embarrassed. Send him a note that says, "When times are tough, we should be there for each other, but you won't give me the chance. Please allow me to remain close to you, because. . . I really like being close to you." That says all that you need to say, and then it's up to him.

    • but he's not really my boyfriend.. we've been seeing each other but we haven't said if we're exclusive.. we haven't said anything... so I don't even know if I could say that to him?

    • You don't need to be in a monogamous relationship to care for someone when they are hurting. If you want to be in an exclusive relationship with him, there is nothing wring with saying these words to him. If you do not want that, then you could say, "I'm here, waiting for you, but please don't make me wait too long. I miss you."

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What Guys Said 3

  • I don't think he is a loser, or you should dump him, that is super mean. Losing your job is obviously very hard to accept and I am sure he feels like a total failure. He is really embarrassed by that and probably feels like less than a man at this point, especially at this time of year. I say to wait it out and give him some space.

  • Give him some space. He may just be embarrassed

  • listen to your friends. thats what you should do


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