He told me he had feelings for me... then used me for sex?

I met this guy in 2014 and we slept together after meeting. Ever since, he's wanted to keep seeing me every week. He was the best friends with benefits relationship I ever had and things were great and casual.

I stopped hearing from him all summer long randomly. A few months ago he got in touch, but I told him I can't sleep with him because I'm seeing sombody else now. Every now and then he msged me to ask if I was still seeing that guy.

Just over the weekend he msged me while he was drunk. I replied back the next morning and he was pretty embarrassed about it, and told me he wants to make things a little different between us, that he really does like me and wants to continue seeing me. I told him how I felt about him too and he said he wants the same, and if that he wants me as his only girl if he's going to do all those things for me. He then asked for a time to come see me to talk about it more. When he wrote this, he wrote me paragraphs back about he feels and that he really does like me.

When he saw me, everything started out fine when we were first catching up. After hooking up started asking me if he could bring his friends in to my work (I'm a waitress) to hook him up with free food. I knew after that point that this was not good. Not long after he told me he was going to head out and made an excuse that he didn't have the day off tmrw anymore to hang out longer. I asked him why he didn't bring up our conversation from a few days back and if he meant what he told me the other day about how he feels. He then started saying I was rushing things/taking it too far and was starting to act crazy and he wasn't comfortable talking about it. I feel upset and really cheap right now. We used to have a really good thing and now he treated me like this.

The next day I sent him a message that what he did was not cool and he shouldn't have lied about his feelings to me. He told me he changed his midn after I flipped out on him for using me for free wings. Did he lie to me just to sleep with me again?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Sure sounds like it. That's a shitty situation to be in. He clearly had no problem using you, the whole thing with the free food proves that. That he is using the fact that you were not comfortable with him taking advantage of you as his excuse to back out of what he was saying pretty much proves that what he was saying is just lip service. He played you badly, treated you badly, and clearly doesn't think much of you as a person or he wouldn't have disrespected you so badly.

    That really sucks :(

    • He really did! I got in touch with him the next day saying what he did was uncool and a dick move. He was supposed to come over to talk to me about his feelings.. not **** and leave like that. Then he gave the excuse about him changing his mind cause I got mad at him for asking me to get free wings for him and his friends.. then he started saying that he did want me to be his girl etc, andI told him I can't give him all of that if he can't have serious conversations with me face to face and if I don't feel like he wants me bacd enough I can't make him my only man. After that, no response.

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  • Yes, seems like he is/was just using you. I would cut this guy out of my life if I were you. He doesn't seem like a good person. People like that are very draining and they only end up making you feel confused and hurt.


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