I see all these beautiful girls out there, and guys I usually want I always think to myself... Out of all these women to choose from, why the hell would they just want one? I'm in no way bitter towards men but honestly I have been hurt many times. I seem to be the girl they try to use or play with until they find a girl they want to get into a relationship with. I have never been that girl, and its so frustrating. They either have a girlfriend and don't tell me until I find out, or get a girlfriend and leave me hanging.
Could it be because im trying to get my shit together? I get so jealous of girls in loving relationships... I feel like I'll never be that person. I can't imagine someone loving me like that. I want it so bad, it honestly hurts. Lonliness hurts so bad...
I know that, I have to focus on me and my life... But I'm so sick of not having someone around, just to fall for and it be true.
Ever since I was 16 I was going for older guys (19-21) and haven't had any luck finding anything true yet. I would use dating websites because finding people in real life isn't so easy. Could this be why? I need some advice... Maybe you were in my situation... I don't know.