Confused after 2 weeks of online flirtation, then meeting the guy to hang out. Is/Was this guy into me, or was he setting me up with his friend?

So I have known this guy online since July, but I did momentarily meet him in person 2 weeks ago. Since then him and I have constantly talked every day, and I would say that the flirting between him and I had progressed/increased significantly since then. Yesterday, I hung out with him, but he also had his female friend, and his other male friend join us. I tried being conversational with the girl, hoping to make a female friend, but she was very standoffish and quiet - if anything seemed totally not interested in talking with me. His male friend seemed interested in talking so I tried speaking with his male friend along with the guy of interest, and still making small attempts with the girl to not leave her out. I was sitting next to the guy of interest, while the girl sat across from him, and his male friend sat across from me. Multiple times throughout the conversation (s), when the guy of interest spoke to me, he would put his hand on my thigh while speaking to me. However, while he had me watching videos, the girl would get up from her seat, go over and hug the guy of interest sitting next to me (from what I could see without looking away, she hugged him to her chest) - her getting up to hug him happened about four times I think. Then at one point, while I was watching another video (he had shown me multiple videos), he got up to go hug her. Oh and when we were all having to leave, the girl suddenly became happy/hyper, and a lot more vocal and friendly. Besides touching my thigh, the only other things he did was walk with me up to the counter as I paid for the rest of the bill, and told me that the squeaky sound I involuntarily made was adorable when the girl suddenly hugged me from behind. Oh, and right before him telling me that, she had been holding both his and the other guy's hands a bit too. I felt like a 3rd wheel by the end of this to say the least. Was this guy even remotely interested in me or what? Both guys were 18, she was 16.

Also, he constantly told me I was cute, and adorable in conversation, along with calling me a "cutie". I also here and there said it back. However, he also said that he liked giving compliments too, but he showed that he tried saying these things to make me blush while in conversation. I didn't expect much from this guy, but at the same time, I am disappointed because I had been interested in him, and he had originally asked me out to a just "me and him" thing. Then his friends tagged along.
Oh also, I only knew him since July ONLINE. Only met him in person two weeks ago for the first time momentarily, and after that the flirtation escalated. This was the first time I ever spent an extended amount of time with the guy.


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  • that's an awfully confusing situation. it sounded like he likes you but then the other girl likes him too and tried desperately to get his attention and was jealous of you and him so was being stiff to you. once she got a hug from him she felt better and loosened up and didn't want your guy to get the jealousy vibe from her so then she decided to hug you to make it seem like everything was good.
    but you paid the bill. I hope he wasn't using you for your money...
    all in all she likes your guy and is jealous of you and he might like you but she's being a distraction. careful with that one, she might be trying to get in the way of your potential relationship

    • Oh she did it more than once (like multiple times she got up to hug only him - it was like 4 times, maybe 5). And I did offer to pay for the whole bill, but everyone pitched in, and I had paid for the guy of interest's sandwich (since he wanted it really bad but only had enough money for the tea that he got).

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    • To be honest, that was probably my first time ever going on an outing with a guy that had an interest in me, and it doesn't help that the girl had a seriously passive aggressive demeanor (she acted the exact same way as this old friend I had that went out with my older brother - she was a bitch). So I'm honestly not sure how to go about that. Honestly, immediately after getting picked up, I just thought that he wasn't worth it if he let her be like that while inviting me out, and then going up to hug her on his own. If you were in my situation, would you still try pursuing this guy? I'm just really confused because he's honestly a very sweet great guy, the only downside is that it seems like he's either really dense/naive, or doesn't mind the idea that this girl may be interested in him, and that he's very huggy with girls in general (I mean he did get up on his own to go hug her too once during the whole thing...).

    • Sorry to be getting back to you so late, it is pretty bad that he'd be doing this outing to spend time with you as an interest but let that go on. If that's just how he is in general, then you have to be willing to accept that about him and let him know that you understand that's his personality, but that you don't like it and can he make an effort not to do that. But if he keeps it up and he seems to be letting this girl continue to hit on him, give him a break. If he's worth it, he'll come back for you.