I blame myself for her cheating?

there's something i did, i wasn't a dick enough, i wasn't good looking enough, i cared too much. Nobody can convince me otherwise. Why would she fucking cheat...


Most Helpful Girl

  • It is not your fault that she chose to cheat. The fact that she chose to cheat on you, be deceitful, and betray you is a reflection of who she truly is deep down and what she's about. Sometimes innocent bystanders get hurt in the process of someone else's mess. But it is not your fault. The chances are that she cheated because she was feeling insecure/needed her body and beauty to be validated or there's something wrong with her moral compass where she didn't care enough about the feelings of others. Please don't beat yourself up.

    • she's still with the guy she cheated on me with to this day, Thats what really kills me. I feel like something about me made her want to find someone else. I honestly believe if i was more manlier, or if i was more of a dick or something, she would have stayed.

    • Don't be foolish.

    • Thats just what i think. Why is that foolish?

Most Helpful Guy

  • Sorry to hear what happened to you man. It's perfectly normal to blame yourself, but no matter how much you may feel responsible she's the one who chose to take those actions. Try not to let it get under your skin too much, or else it could end up changing who you are and next time you might screw up something good, because of what this bitch did to you.

    • But how do i convince myself it wasn't my fault. Its been months and i still blame myself. Like i could have done something to keep her.

    • You have to put it all in perspective. Stop idolising her and seeing only the good, and also realise that both of you are only human. You are flawed. Accept that. You are allowed to be. Just like everyone else. But you cannot take her agency away from her. She acted. Not your fault.

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What Girls Said 1

  • It's not your fault at all. I never think that there is a valid excuse for cheating when breaking up like someone who isn't a coward and a cruel human being would do. Some people just don't seem to get it, and she's one of them.
    I was cheated on by my ex, and he cheated on me with a horrible girl who was nasty on the inside out, with no good qualities to be found, and I was down for a long time and thought that because he chose her over me that I wasn't good enough, but it wasn't true. I don't know why people cheat or why they do it to certain people with certain people, but they do. It isn't because you're not good enough though. It's almost like some people just have an impulse to do stuff like that.

    • Its so hard being told its not my fault and actually believe it. I don't know why.. I really miss and want her. But she's so fucking toxic and its pathetic that i would rather hurt myself and be with her because she made me happy.

    • I understand. I know it sounds cliche, but it will get better with time and you will realize that you are better off without her. I was completely and totally in love with my ex who cheated on me, and I hurt for almost a year after that.

What Guys Said 1

  • Nah bro. She's scum. You aren't. Plain and simple.