Does he feel the same as me? What am I supposed to do?

My feelings for him are so strong and have been there from the begining but I pushed him away because I was scared. We first hooked up a year ago, and have been hooking up ever since. He asked me out on a date a month after we hooked up and we then hung out a few more times. He was making an effort then and showing he liked me but I was still at school then, 3 hours away so we would just sleep together whenever we saw each other. I finished school 6 months ago and moved back to where were both from. We never talked about what we were or our feelings and I guess I just assumed it was casual. I pushed him away because I would only message him when I was drunk and we'd hook up when we were drunk because I thought he didn't like me anymore. I think he felt I had rejected him a few months ago when he made a rude comment then tried to kiss me, and I didn't let him so he just left the bar. I was angry because I didn't know what we were and I told him we should just be friends. I didn't mean that, I just said it because I was upset and confused. I've also done things like say he should be with other people because I thought he didn't like me. I liked him all along and he liked me. And now its just sex, physical which is not what I ever wanted nor him I dont think but it just got to this unfortunetly. All I wanted was to spend time with him and I didn't know what he wanted.
He is still always awkward and shy towards me when he first sees me and barley makes eyecontact with me.. makes me feel awkward too but after a few hours (or few drinks) we always gravitate towards eachother and end up together (talking and he'll always be close to me). We both admitted we like eachother when we talked drunk but have gotten no where.
But now I am moving away in a month does that change how he feels/acts? I found out he just went on a date with some girl last week and am very upset over it, but I did sleep with someone a few weeks ago too and have been talking to guys all along and he wasn't until this date... What do I do? I just want to be with him. No more BS and I dont want anyone else. I supressed my feelings did he do that also? He told me he is scared of rejection and dosnt take it well


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