Not sure why this guy is acting this way, help? (Long)

This guy found me on a dating site, we chat well online. We met in person like two weeks later, clicked extremely well. Went on 2 more dates (A week after 1st then another week in between, and I planned these dates) and I told him I really liked him, basically told me that he liked me but not on that level yet, taking his time. We both have been hurt in the past. I waited for him to make the next plans and after 2 weeks he invites me over the weekend after, he lives alone. He becomes distant online; I figured maybe he was nervous.

At his place, I caught him checking me out 2 times, and he flirted with me by poking me, hitting me with pillows and put this stress cube on my arms, legs and head. I was nervous, mainly because I liked him a lot still, and I knew he was taking his time so I wasn’t sure how to act, and he also made dinner. He did ask if dinner was good, which it was, and asked if I was just being nice, told him I’m not that mean and plus I almost finished all of what he cooked me). He asked if I had fun, which I did and asked if I was interested in this game he showed me, which I was and he goes on saying something like ‘oh I wasn’t sure if you where just flattering me by letting me talk about it’. Not sure why he asked that and he thinks I’m shy around him and asked how I am with friends.

Sunday, he wasn't online till real late, but said he wanted to say hello, was nice, he was also feeling sick as to why he wasn’t on till late. Next day he asked about my career choice, since I’m thinking of changing it, said that I wanted to help people who have been through the same stuff I have and all he said was ‘ah, cool’. A close friend has his SN, he suddenly asked what her name was, I told him and asked why, and all he said was that he was curious. I asked her and she was talking to him and asked him about when I was over, and all he told her was that we watched movies and it was nice to have a visitor and he changed the subject with her, and after I asked him why he went to bed.

Sorry if it was really long but not sure how to cut it down, since he acts interested then kind of doesn’t. He also still goes on the dating site; he stopped after he invited me over but started again after I came over. I go on to delete emails and see if he was on.

Note that I’m 23 and only dated one guy for about 5 years and this new guy is 25.

Also no mean comments please, I know I may be over analyzing things but it does kind of bother me.

Also I'm not making my friend contact him, she's doing that on her own.


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What Guys Said 2

  • Not to be mean, but your sound very "invested" in this. Like, too invested.

    You're having your friends contact him to find out what he says? And then interpreting his statements?

    I'd say he isn't interested because he's getting the distinct impression you're a bit psychotic.

    He's not worth all this extra effort, that's for sure.

    And you're only going to make things worse for yourself by trying to continuing this. I say do yourself (and him) a favor and end it.

    • Im not making her contact him, she's doing it on her own, I perfer her not to since I don't want to scare him away.

    • Don't prefer, DEMAND!

      She IS going to scare him away if she continues, and I'm not entirely convinced she hasn't already.

      Your friend has no right to intersede on your behalf, this is your problem, not hers.

      And why is it he contacted her afterall?

  • Its new...its in the infancy stages, let it go slow. Take what you get. Be yourself, be flirty, be agressive when called for, and let him be the same back. New relationships are hard, and its almost like all the stars need to be aligned for them to get on the right track and go forward instead of stalling and ending. Be patient...


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