Guys, is it possible to find/meet one girl who can change my mind/perspective?

The guy I'm dating pretty much laid everything out on the table. Some of it I agree with because I too, have the same views, but some of it kind of bothered me and I don't know how to go about.

For instance, he hates dating, he hates relationships, he's admitted he's cheated on a couple girls and yeah he feels terrible about but he did date some shitty girls, he doesn't want to get married or have kids, he just wants to go with the flow. Certain aspects I agree and understand but I'm more of a relationship type girl and eventually I'd like to see where this can go. As a guy, say you have the same thoughts as the ones listed above, if you met the right girl who actually treated you the way you deserved to be treated, would it maybe have you re-think your thoughts about dating, relationships, etc? Or are you pretty much set in your ways, no matter who comes along?

Typically when a guy tells me he's cheated, I run. But there's something about this guy... and I know I can treat him exactly how he deserves and needs. I'm not put off by him. If anything, I want to know more. What're your thoughts, guys?

  • The right girl can change our mind!
    Vote A
  • Girl, run. He won't change his mind.
    Vote B
Select a gender to cast your vote:
Girls can not vote on this poll
I'm a Guy


Most Helpful Guy

  • Yes it's what relationships do. The support and care of a good woman. Who shows support physically and mentally is what helps us guys to be more mature about life. A home and children come from trust and reassurance.
    Good luck

    • Thank you! I appreciate that. I know he's been through some stuff, as have I, so I get where he's coming from but I don't want him to feel like he has to have that mentality always. Especially if I want to pursue something more eventually.

    • Show All
    • We'll definitely have to stay in touch! I'll let you know, hope it works for the best! haha

    • I have fingers and toes crossed for you 😃

Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 5

  • Yes it is possible, but extremely rare. Guys like that almost never change. The girls who end up trying almost always get cheated on. Its a common player move "The reformed bad boy" is incredibly attractive to women, though personally I don't know why. "Yea baby, I cheated on those other girls, but "theres something about you thats special."" Also, if you notice he seems to be trying to justify cheating, from what you have told us, by saying he dated, some "shitty girls". He is trying to make it sound less like a betrayal, more like a "they deserved it" kind of thing, while adding to "you are different/special. People who try and justify their actions like that really aren't too sorry.

    Again, posible for a guy like this to change, but very rare, and from what you said here I dont think he wants too.


  • I picked B because of what you said. You say he pretty well laid it on the line and doesn't want to get married nor wants children. So unless that exactly what you want otherwise you're wasting your time with him. Plus you said his past girlfriends weren't good so he cheated. I had a couple of bad girl friends too but I didn't cheat on them I let them go and those were his choices too.

  • He is just lowering expectations. If he's happy with you, he'll seek a relationship.

    • Thanks for your input! We are definitely still in the learning stages, so I'm not expecting a relationship right now, but just when the time comes I want him to know that it is okay. I've been through a lot of the same things he has been through, so I know how it feels I just want him to feel comfortable.

  • you want to change him