Waiting for guy to make the next move... will it happen?

Two months ago, I met this guy from Tinder. We really hit it off and even made out at the end of the night. The next day, he texted me telling me he had a really great time amongst other things. The conversation stopped after we were laughing at something via text, and I didn't feel the need to respond any more.

I didn't hear from him for a month, until a little over a month later he texted me wishing me a merry Christmas (this wasn't on Christmas) and then asked me if I wanted to hang out later that day. I said I couldn't because I had family in town at the time, but that we should hang another time. He responded that we definitely hang again.

Two or three weeks after that last conversation, I texted him asking him if he wanted to hang this week since I couldn't last time. He said that sounds great and we made plans for a day that week. He also complimented my new whatsapp pic and said I look pretty cute. The morning that we're supposed to hang out, he texted me at 8am saying he caught a bad cold yesterday and that he can't hang tonight. He then said something like, "Maybe next week or something? Let me know." I told him next week or wheneva works for me. He said great and that we'll keep in touch. It's been 6 days and it's already the "next week" aka the week we're supposed to hang and I haven't heard from him. I don't want to text him and seem pushy or desperate, but I really want to see him again! I know he works... but thoughts? Think I'll hear from him again (soon)?


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What Guys Said 2

  • You can see how well waiting for him to do all the legwork has worked so far. You 'didn't feel the need to respond' early on so you didn't get anything for a month. Then you agreed you should hang and... stopped talking to him again.

    Now he's been sick, you agreed to keep in touch... and you stopped talked to him AGAIN.

    Are you interested in him or not? Why aren't YOU texting HIM? You don't have to bombard him, but you're not exactly sending many signals showing interest if you don't ever reach out to him for weeks at a time. He's probably doubting it's going to happen, too.

    • I disagree. I asked him out and he had to cancel. Plus, a "we'll stay in touch" text doesn't really need a follow-up. It's kind of like saying, "I'll get back to you next week."

    • Show All
    • That seems too pushy or clingy. I guess I figured he would contact me when he's feeling better "next week"

    • Sending him one message asking how he's doing is not pushy or clingy. More than one (if you don't get a response) is.

  • We... people almost always use Tinder to just hook-up. Maybe he's just trying his luck with multiple women. I would never take anyone I met on Tinder seriously, and you shouldn't either.


What Girls Said 1

  • I've been in this situation soooo many times. If I had a nickel for every time... anyway, I'm sorry to say that in almost every case the guy just never really wanted to take any initiative. And that's not a reflection on you, because even if a guy likes you sometimes they're fickle and not really looking for anything, and thus don't make dates a priority. Which is fine for the short term but it gets frustrating when you really like a guy but they're super passive about everything. I'd give it one more shot maybe, and if he bails again just write him off. Those types of guys you could wait around forever and they'll still never come around. Not worth it.