Girls, do you care about your first serious boyfriend or current boyfriend more?
I'm struggling here. I'm not the first guy there and feel that the first boyfriend is always better than me. She chose him first for a reason and therefore I feel he must be the better choice and has something I don't have. I guess I'm suffering from late bloomer syndrome.
As a result, this thinking destroys all relationships I've have and my general view of dating women. I'm in a viscious pattern where i date a girl, i end up using her for sex, start treating her bad, and then leaving. All because I wasn't chosen first. I'm with a girl currently and about the start this cycle again.
I think I can break the cycle by understanding women better. Do you care about your first serious boyfriend or current boyfriend more?
- First serious boyfriend moreVote A
- Current serious boyfriend moreVote B
Most Helpful Girl
I mean, think about yr first job, versus yr current job.
Ok, I just looked at yr age, so you might have to use yr imagination a bit here, but, imagine yr first job (probably some summer gig as a teenager) vs. yr future career.
Yr first job was:
• To a large extent, something you picked because it was (1) there, and (2) actually available to you, from a limited pool of choices.
• In retrospect, most likely totally out of sync with yr actual skill set...
• ... though you didn't know that at the time.
• Ultimately, a learning experience.
• You might still reminisce fondly about it, because most normal people reminisce fondly about most things -- even things that were, in point of actual fact, kinda shitty. Really, most people don't have shitty collective memories. It's a survival/coping mechanism -- the positive stuff stays at the forefront, for most people.
You see where I'm going with this. The analogies should be pretty obvious.
First boyfriend, for most girls, is just a dude who was there. I mean, we HAD to have a boyfriend, because, dude, all the cool girls had boyfriends, right?
For most of us, boyfriend #1 was just laughably out of sync with what we actually need (ed) in a dude, but... the only way we could possibly learn that, was by having relationships like that.
And, yeah, we probably look back on it fondly, because that's the way most people look back on most things.
Really, don't mindfuck yrself too much here.0