How to tell someone you are not attracted to them?

Ok so I've been talking to this girl a lot over email and text. We are on an online dating site and we for the last two weeks really enjoy talking to each other. We haven't met yet due to busy schedules but that's changing tomorrow night.

My problem is, I crept her FB and I honestly don't know how attracted I am to her. In some photos I am, in others I'm not. I obviously still want to go out with her as you see people differently in person.

What I'm worried about is - what if im not attracted to her? It's obvious we have great chemistry, we flirt and talk to each other a lot. What if she really really likes me after this date but then I'm not attracted? How do I break that news to her? In the past I've dealt with these situations very very poorly and I don't want to really hurt her if it comes to this. Any advice is appreciated!

I was attracted and they were attracted - we've gone out 3 times, it's worked out so far


Most Helpful Guy

  • if you dont like her just say the attraction isn't there and leave it at that. you owe her no explanations.

    • I agree with you. Just be honest about it ^^ Or just say in general you do not think it will work. But please do not keep going out with her because you feel bad for her!

    • Show All
    • Ok perfect, thank you! That's what I did in the past, I'd keep going out with them hoping I'd become attracted and and not wanting to hurt feelings. If im not attracted I'll tell her in a respectful way

    • yeah you can't keep doing it cuz then it makes it worse when you do break it to em

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What Girls Said 3

  • Of you're going to Base a relationship on looks alone then she's better off without you. You should let her know beforehand it's not a serious date so she doesn't get her hopes up. And many people look good in pics but most are average or below in person and minus make up.

  • You don't owe her anything. If you are genuinely curious you could meet up with her and then if you feel the attraction isn't there then that's no big deal and all you have to do is explain you didn't feel that 'spark'.. who knows she may decide she's not attracted to you anyway and then the problem is solved ;)

  • Tell her "I am sorry, but my penis doesn't like you"
    I am obviously joking. Tell her to meet up. If you still don't like her, simply tell her:
    "I think I'd rather be friends with you" or "I don't feel the "spark"".


What Guys Said 0

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