How do I step up my game?

My college roommates saw my lack of success with women, and wanted to help me out. they tried to get me to dance like I was in a club, but I sucked at dancing. They simulated a date at a restaurant, and saw my lack of confidence. they also noticed how I tended to make the conversation a bit awkward. they told me that I had a lot of improvement. so, how do I make myself datable? I never had a girlfriend and still am a virgin.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Instead of chasing directly for the opposite gender, how about network? Try to build up an army of friends, both male and female. It'll just get you comfortable interacting around both men (which you probably are) and women (which you currently aren't).

    Everything will be easier once you start making lots of female friends and getting close with them, at which point you'll be able to navigate and talk to women easily also for dating purposes.

    • After you lose your virginity it becomes even easier. Sex won't be some big scary tense thing you never experienced before, everything will be easier once you do it. First time is the biggest uphill challenge, after that it's downhill and easy.

    • Okay, this is naughty advice, but it worked for me when I was younger as "training wheels". One possible thing to try is liquid courage. Down a few shots of alcohol and then try. This is a last resort strategy, and you don't want to become overdependent on liquid courage, you want to ween off of it once you get laid, get comfortable around women, etc. But having a few drinks to calm your nerves might help get your feet (well, not feet in this case) wet.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Obviously your issue is primarily confidence.

    If your ego can handle a bunch of rejections, go get them. Approaching girls is easy after you get the first few out of the way.

    If your ego can not handle that ( they will happen no matter how attractive you are and they will almost certainly be less than nice about it, sorry ) you need to build up that confidence in yourself first. Get over whatever inferiority complex you have.