Did I miss my chance by not making a move? Why is she so hot and cold?

I met this girl about a month ago, we have been texting a lot everyday and we hanged-out about 7-8 times. In the past 2weeks, she has been flirting very hard making it clear that she's interested. Most of the flirting was in text because both times i asked her on a date she was too busy. She is actually very busy and what I don't like is that she usually hangs out with me last minute which is not a good sign but with all the signs she gave me, I believe she's just busy. She made jokes of sleeping in same bed, told me she was so happy she met me, wanted me to go watch her soccer game, and even said 'I love you' by text in Spanish after I told her she should teach me Spanish. These are just a couple examples. However we hanged out a good 5-6 in a very casual way without touching, then one night we got drunk together and she ended up in my bed. Nothing happened other than cuddleing, because she was just too drunk and im not that type of guy. After that night is when she reached her interest peak, and a couple days after that she wanted to come over to watch netflix which we did. We watched a movie cuddleing in bed and holding hands but this is where I think I messed up. I got nervous, the whole movie went through without me kissing her. All I did was hug her when she left. She got home latter, texted me had a good time with hearts and kisses. But since that day she seems to be distant, she still text me daily but in a boring way, and ignores some of my texts including flirty ones. We haven't hanged-out in 5days become she's just been busy everynight she says. Since I met her, she did go hot and cold certain days but it was never that strong. The other night I texted her 'cant wait to see you play soccer' she ignored it, one day I sent 'Good Morning' same thing, and she's been ignoring multiple others and then texting something different a couple hours latter. How should I react? Did not making a move push her away?, I appreciate any adive.


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  • Ehh I think you're overthinking it. You think you should "make a move" on her and if you don't she'll leave you. Here's the thing: Be you. If you weren't ready to kiss her after the movie then that's fine. Don't feel like you're forced to do something. You shouldn't be. Is that the reason why she's the way you perceive her to be? I don't know, but she should accept you for you. If you didn't want to "make a move" then you didn't want to "make a move". So what?

  • Move on and let her reach out to you. No more daily text. See what happens.

    Don't ever feel rushed to make a move on a girl just to keep her. Go with what you feel comfortable doing.