I met this guy and we're on the verge of dating. I really like him, and he asked me out, but I didn't give an answer yet because there were certain things I needed to think about. Now I think I've come to a conclusion, that I would like to date him, but one of the problems is that he lives in another city.
I know he's very attached to me sentimentally, but I'm afraid that if ever he meets some girl he wants to have sex with where he lives, and that because of me he doesn't do it, it may cause unnecessary drama. The thing is that I don't feel ready for anything sexual with him yet, so maybe he would hold a slight grudge if he had to sacrifice his sex life for someone who isn't even giving him anything yet... Or else maybe he would sleep with a girl and keep it a secret because he would feel guilty towards me, and that would drive us apart.
Things like that. I actually prefer him sleeping with other girls, than seeing our sentimental bond weakening because of it. The only thing I'm afraid of is that once, during a party, some girl was saying that she had hated it when her boyfriend had told her he didn't mind she slept with other guys -- and the guy I like agreed with her. He wasn't paying much attention at that moment, but it still had me thinking: do guys generally find it repulsive when the girl they like allows them more freedom? Also he has already been possessive with me, and I know I wouldn't even want to sleep with anybody else, so it would be a one way deal.
Thanks for your help!
Most Helpful Guy
Honestly to most of us it will seem as if you do not like us enough to want us for yourself. So you're in a tough spot there.
You don't need to feel bad about this though. Reality is that we know what we're doing when we commit to someone. And we are doing it because being with them and sharing what we share is something we WANT. We're not forced, there's no gun to our head or anything. It is an active choice made fully aware of the likely effects.
Meaning: Your guy would be choosing you knowing that sex wouldn't really be a thing for the foreseeable future.