What's up with girls on Tinder believing I am not real? Should I confront her about her game?

They send me "super likes" or just "like" me back, but after a while the moment comes where they doubt that I am real.

Yes, I do speak 3 languages, yes, I am at a top 100 university, yes, I am studying psychlogy, yes, I really am learning Japanese and it's going really well.

I had a girl on there send me a "super like" today- we only chatted a bit about our common culture and I asked whether she was free on the next weekend. She then said

"I don't know yet" .

Then she asked me for my Facebook, which I actually only accept people to come in I've met personally. She became pretty "aggressive" about it, claiming that she only meets people where she is sure they are "real" .

Seriously? Does she believe she can fool a psychology student by playing this game?

- It'll come out sooner or later whether I'm real or not physically speaking
-She could ask me to speak these languages
-She could ask for my student ID

It doesn't add up: You can't know whether you're going to have time on the weekend or not at age 20. At this age, you should be able to plan ahead and manage to set enough time to study.

Should I confront her and tell her to f*ck off?
Should I be like " You know what? I've had girls play this game before with me - I rather go and learn Japanese and improve my skill instead of wasting my time with you"


Most Helpful Girl

  • Don't take this the wrong way but I have heard some sketchy reports about Tinder. It's not like MocoSpace caliber ratchet but sleazy stuff kind of does happen. You have a lot going for you so you can't blame the all-pervasive catfish paranoia. I like how you take it as a security breach challenge lol! That's awesome. I'm down with tactical maneuvers myself and when dudes try to talk some whatever, I'm thinking: "Don't mess with the Field Marshal." XD

    • P. S. Japanese is really hard for a non native speaker because they have 3 different alphabets and the structure does not coordinate with German or English AT ALL so that's why she doesn't believe you. Maybe you are just super adept at linguistics and she can't relate.

    • Show All
    • And this is combined with Psychology again !

      But in real life, I had a guy tell me that his friend, a girl, is asking for a date, I said "yes" but before he could reach the table they'd been sitting at, that girl had stood up and left and her other 2 girlfriends followed her. The guy apologized for this. This happened when I was sitting at Starbucks.
      Means, I must have been too intimidating or something :/

    • Thank you for Most Helpful☆

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What Girls Said 2

  • I get your point you don't want to be played, but I understand her view too because I'm also a girl who used to be active on tinder for a year and a half. There's only 2 guys that i actually met in real life through Tinder because I added them on whatsapp first and talked to them for weeks plus we shared selfies and I even skyped with one of them. Because girls are pretty vulnerable when it comes to meeting up with strangers.
    Like you're being real, but I bet there really are guys on tinder who pretend to be some perfect guy and then seduce girls to meet up and then kidnap them, rape them or even murder them, so see it from her perspective, she's probably just trying to look out for herself :)

    • Oh and on top of that I think a lot of girls on Tinder don't actually ever meet up with any of the guys they talk to. They like chatting and flirting with them online but when it's time to meet up, they're too timid or too scared, so that could be why a lot of girls don't seem eager to meet up in real life...

    • but it's very wrong from girls to think all guys are potentially the worst kind of people, as fewest people are actually evil.

    • I wouldn't say it's wrong but I agree that it's unfair towards all those good guys out there, but I would rather be extra carefull and prevent something terrible from happening, then to give the wrpng person a chance to do something terrible to me

  • face time her or something?
    that should be enough proof
    she could be fake too you know, not only guys use fake pictures online

    • I know, I could have said " I could demand the same from you" But It's understandable if I want to keep my details on other social media private.. especially if we haven't met yet

    • yeah you are right :)
      from what i have heard tinder is not a good app to meet people and most girls there are full of themselves. try whisper or something, its not a dating app but you can see how far people there from you and i have talked to many great girls/boys there

What Guys Said 1

  • "Does she believe she can fool a psychology student by playing this game?"

    Hahahha I LOLed so hard at this line. You go dude.

    • I appreciate it that you find this funny xD

      But all jokes aside, I meanwhile do feel like a CIA agent who is conducting an interrogation with the girls he meets - It's like a Homeland Security interrogation -.- - They keep telling me things that just won't add up and I keep listening and I pretend to play the game just to attain more certainty that they are lying -.-

    • Just dump all those online girls and stick up with the real ones haha.

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