I kinda just recently started dressing up and going out more. Visually, I am really a head turner if I may say so myself. I'm not full of myself, but I am well aware of my physical attributes (and have been told endlessly about my attractiveness). But it happened just recently since I had a late puberty. I used to have severe acne and I was awkward af. I've only slept with 2 guys so far, one was my boyfriend and the other was a player. After my recent experience with this player, he really did a number on my heart. He broke me continuously and now I just don't believe in love at all (so classic I know). I just wanna live it up and have sex randomly and safely, when I want it and with who I want. I don't want anything more because I am genuinely afraid to feel again because of the disaster I was just in.
I met this amazing guy. Visually, he is average. But our personalities click 100%. And he has totally fallen for me. He keeps mentioning the word girlfriend, saying he'll never leave, how happy he is he met me, he can't believe his luck etc. He already is buying me flowers and coffee and praises me like non other. I LIKE him and want him in my life but I don't want to hurt him either. We've only made out. I don't plan on having sex with him soon. However, I'm talking to like 10-20 other potential guys and although I will only sleep with maybe a couple or 3 or 4, I feel guilty.
I don't know what to do because I DO want something real but I also don't bc the previous guy destroyed me for the last few months. I just got back my life and I just wanna have fun. What do I do?