New bf's old friend came to visit and I think they've been more than just friends?

So this girl my new boyfriend of 5 months used to work with, came to visit this past weekend. She arrived around 5:30 on Saturday night and we were all supposed to meet up later and go out.

Him and her went out to dinner and caught up, but he didn't text me until 11:30 to meet. That kind of annoyed me because I could have been doing other things prior to meeting up with them. I was with friends, yes, cause I knew he was out, but I cut it short with them because I figured he'd call by 9:30?

We went to a lounge and when we were standing in line he had his arm around her which kind of made me uncomfortable. He's usually extremely PDA, perhaps too much LOL, he didn't really give me a kiss or put his arm around me until other guys in the club started hitting on me because it looked like him and the other girl were likely together and I was the third wheel. Then his friend started making out with some guy, so he was normal the rest of the night.

They slept at my house that night because I have 3 bedrooms and live alone, when they left, he didn't kiss me or anything it was kind of awkward. He has four roommates and no extra beds in his house so I was assuming they shared a bed while she was there. He texted me the next day saying he slept like shit because he slept on the couch. I didn't ask him he just volunteered that information to me.. why? lol.

Then last night they went out to an expensive restaurant together. I don't know who paid but he never takes me anywhere like that, lol.. so I'm kind of annoyed and just really turned off by him.

I totally understand it was a friend visiting and you obviously have to spend time with you friend in town, but I'm at the point where when I smell bullshit I'm usually right.


Most Helpful Guy

  • i think he's just giving her a really warm welcome because its been a while and its the first time, but if it happens again, I'm sure he'll keep it way more casual.

    you might be a little worried but you have no cause for concern right now, it was just one night.

    • She was here for 4 days. I saw him the first night but haven't seen him since.

    • oooh. well you are his girlfriend so you can address your concern.

    • lol in the interim, I will ask strangers on the world wide web...

Most Helpful Girl

  • for the most part, it just sounds like he's trying not to make his friend feel like a third wheel.

    that said, some of the other stuff is sketchy... him taking her out to dinner alone and his volunteering information you didn't ask for should definitely raise some red flags. if it bothers you, talk to him about it, but keep the focus on how you feel.

    • We both suck at communication. I know that's terrible, but I know on my end is I am trying not to let him get too close. The last guy I dated for 3 years had a "friend" who was just a "friend" yeah they ended up banging during our relationship.
      I definitely don't go to candlelit dinners with my male friends.

    • does your boyfriend know about your past relationship? if he doesn't, you need to tell him because it's going to affect your relationship with him.

      if you have told him and he did this anyway, he's just being a disrespectful douchetard and you need to lose this loser altogether.

What Guys Said 1

  • What a fucking dickhead. All I can really say.


What Girls Said 1

  • I smell bullshit as well... I don't know. I wouldn't be okay with this if I were in your shoes. Always trust your gut feeling and intuition. Always.