If you don't find someone by your deadline then what?

I always had conversations with my sister and said (sis) one of these days I'm going to quit trying altogether. She'd then ask what if the perfect girl came one day after you quit then what? I said then I'd turn her away and not feel bad about it at all. I feel like I wouldn't be able to help it (already almost to that point) the capability for love is leaving me anyways just getting tired and bored with the whole thing. (The only girls that crush on me are girls who are just not my type) and it's a headache because I have to turn them down knowing they may be feeling how I feel. I guess a separate question is should I just date someone who has low self esteem that has a crush on me and make them happy? (I suppose on my end someone is better than no one also). For now I just watch shows with female characters I like and dream. Please help :)


What Girls Said 2

  • For me, is all bout plans, and back up plans. I have plans on having a husband after we both have established careers (24-27) after that I plan on having kids and having a family (27-30) Now im the kind of gal that have a bio-timline. so i refuse to have kids after 30 so my deadline is 30.
    I told myself, if im 29 and for some reason i can't find a man to share my life with, I would get a sperm donor and be a single mom by choice. Thats by backup plan.
    the point is, its ok to have deadlines for yourself. but i dont think it should mess up what happens after. For all ik i could meet the love of my life after 30, but i wouldn't let that stop me just because i chose to have a kid.

    • :o I forgot girls have biological clock timelines. Do you think that pushes many girls to settle for men they don't love just for the sake of having someone to fill that biological clock time limit?

    • honestly, for most girls, yes.
      men usually don't think about settling down till later because, they got time. But women got till 35 for kids etc.
      Now I would marry for love and stability. I wanna spend the rest of my life with that person. But if thats not ment for me, then ill make my own love with a child.

  • I think it's far too young for you to give up in love. I'm 30 and have had my heartbroken and I'm still open to the possibility.

    • My sister would give you a standing ovation lol! I know I'm still young this is kinda related to this I'm not into doing things for the sake of my well being I don't care about money career or anything only reason why I'm even doing college and getting great grades is for the potential family I may have in the future I actually wouldn't mind living in the woods off the grid. Sometimes that seems like the best thing to do for me. Do you think the reason why you are still able to wait after all this time is because you are stronger than me? I feel like i'm out of energy to continue waiting. Thanks for replying! :D

    • I definetely don't think you should do things for other people. I think you are out of energy cos you are doing things your not passionate about.

    • maybe you're right I don't know many things that I like that I am also good at and being low energy like I am I don't know if I want to per say start from scratch and learn these things like painting, drawing etc. not that family would approve anyways.

What Guys Said 1

  • Funny thing I never looked for love. Love kinda found me. I think you would be surprised how someone you think isn't your type might be if you just try.

    • I think I'm one of those people that are contradictory I'll make another question and explain why I'd be grateful if you see that question too when I make it in a few mins! by the way so you were never anxious about meeting the one? that's so weird to me lol.