Where/how did I do this wrong?

So This girl is an 8+, very cute, shy and reserved exactly my type, she is my friends friend and works at a small cafe, we sometimes go there and after 3 times of her being extremely nervous around me and staring at me like crazy (even my friends noticed ) i decided to give it a go and added her on facebook, she accepted and we chatted online for few hours, this lasted few days until she suddenly didn't answer (it was flowing smoothly though) i moved on and about a week later i sent her a message saying lets not make things awkward i visit your work place a lot , forget that i ever said anything about getting to know you or being with you... she was got confused and wanted to know why and what she did wrong, she swore to god she never meant anything and doesn't know how she made me upset, i told her its okay but she continued texting anyway so i gave it another go...

We have texted for the past week or two, she tells me everything about her life and family and we have long conversations sometimes but sometimes she replies with one words and goes numb, i asked for her number once and she changed the subject as to not give it to me, i asked her again two days ago (after a week ) and she said no with a smile, i asked why and if she's afraid of me and she replies with "no i just dont give my number like that, my classmate knew me for 4 years before he got it" i told her "well iam not your classmate and this is a different situation" ... she was like "how?" and i explained to her that i actually want to ge to know her and it wasn't because were in the same class... i made it obvious i want her and she didn't say no and continued texting but at the same time didn't say yes so i got bored after she replied with one words, so i replied with two words and closed the chat.

sorry if its too long, any ideas? did i do anything wrong?

i know that her being shy and all means i gotta wait a while but i guess when you like someone and that someone likes you and you have his facebook and he has yours and you've been exchanging infor for the past month a phone number is not something you shouldn't wanna give... i waited but after a month it doesn't seem to be going anywwhere...


What Girls Said 2

  • I think she's a very careful type of girl who doesn't give her trust easily to guys she just met.

    Yes, you guys are off to a great start, but did you know what I noticed? The both of you rarely talk in person. You need to really talk to her in person, face to face, to gain trust. You can't hide behind your screen and chat with her and then meet her in person like an acquaintance. You need to change that to make things less awkward and more real.

    Maybe you can't because there's no time for that, but you can set a date. Maybe a park, a mall. Once you do that, things will get better.

    Trust me, it works:)

    • as i said she's really shy and her parents are strict so dates are not something that she does, i want ot talk to her in person indeed but i live 20-25 mins away and whenever i see her she's at work so i can't exactly grab her and tell her lets talk , not with 3 other co workers and 10 customers waiting in line, i honestly dont care about the phone number i just want to see that she truly wants something to happen between us, its just a way of showing me that, i have no problem chatting on facebook but she hasn't given any signs of wanting anything more than talking, i tried more than 3 times to get a reaction out of her and i made it obvious i want her but she either laughs it off or something , i am the kind who gets bored easily so chasing girls is not something i do, in fact i got 4 numbers last months doing nothing. not trying to say i want her to chase me but at least give me a sign that you value what iam doing !!

    • she doesn't give me any signs but she tells me everything about her life, i know what she eats, what doctor she goes to, what clothes she likes, her parents, siblings, work schedule, friends, ... etc

    • She either doesn't take you as seriously as you want her to, or she just needs to spend more time with you.

      You said that her parents are strict on dates... you have to keep that in mind, because if the relationship becomes serious, it's going to get in the way. And as of now, there's really nothing you can do but text her, and maybe when you have the time, wait for her at her finishing hours and walk her home or chat a bit.

  • No you didn't do anything wrong! :) she just seems like a odd ball! And very socially awkward.. You sure you have the energy to keep up with her?

    • thats what i've been asking myself lately, sure she's reserved and doesn't let any guy get in just like that and thats good she's defintely girlfriend material , but if i have to work a year to get her and she keeps acting like that its not worth it , off screen she's shy and reserved, but when we chat online she is much more open and confident, and thats good but i need something to work with, i can't keep trying without seeing results !!

    • Show All
    • well its is kinda the way you described it, she obviously likes hearing what i've got to say and she seems to enjoy talking to me but she never texts first and she never mentioned anything about a relationship even though i've hinted few times, iam sure she like every other girl wants to play it safe, but i just can't stick around for months at time to figure out if a girl likes me thats not really an option cause its way too stressful and time consuming, i have put it on hold atm and I don't know, we'll see what happens chances are iam not gonna hear anything from her.

    • Well try to forget about her! It sounds more stressful than happy to be honest..

What Guys Said 1

  • Talk to her, the key is in her

    • I have for the past month, i asked why not give me her number and why she didn't answer a couple texts i sent, and her response is always " i didn't see them " or " i was at work and busy" sure that works sometimes but if its happens more than twice it becomes annoying, the funny thing is i sent her a smiley face with a heart instead of eyes after she sent me few smilies, she never sent me anything similia, r she wouldn't give me her number, and she acts like she doesn't want a relatiomship bit at the same time she gets invested in the conversations sometimes and tells me really personal things about her so iam not sure what to make out of it, i asked her if she has a thing with my friend and didn't answer but acted like she got upset or something, i said okay and she sent me a funny photo moments later... you can't act like you want me but when i try to get you, you reject my offer its not how tings work girl !!

Loading... ;