Girlfriend did weed. I am Angry. What do I do?

Okay. So this is not the first time she has done this. But the previous one was before we started dating, and what happened once she was high was quite bad (she was molested).

Once we started dating, I asked her not to do it again, and yet, she did it today.
I don't know what to say. I mean, I am really pissed. I dont want to break up with her, but I dont like this either.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Well you're a minor so I guess so is she and I'm also guessing it might be illegal to smoke weed where you are?
    Just talk to her in a mature moment but lastly you can't really dictate what other people do so if she really wants to smoke weed she's probably going to again sooner or later :P

    • Yes, it is illegal here. I honestly don't want to dictate it, but seeing what has happened in the past with all the drugs and alcohol, I want her to stop. And right now, I am just confused.

    • Show All
    • Well tell her that maybe she should think about her choices in friends than..

    • yea, or at least when she gets high you re at least with her

Most Helpful Guy

  • Tell her if she does it again then you'll break up with her. Tell her you only want what's best for her and so you're giving her a chance.

    If she can't accept that then you should leave her.

    • Is he her boyfriend or her father?

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    • No, it's not. You're young and you still think that codependence is the same as love. Maybe when you've been through a serious relationship or two you'll get it. If she wants to change, she will. If she doesn't want to, guilt trips will just make her leave him at best or stay in the relationship while resenting him at worst. You can't dictate what your partner is and is not allowed to do in a relationship and expect them to be happy. That's what a parent does. He's not her parent. He's her boyfriend.

    • @LaVilaine my age is irrelevant. You don't know what I've been through so you're only making rash assumptions.
      How is he supporting her use of drugs? That's not codependency.
      And I'm fully aware of the differences between codependency and love.

      It's not a guilt trip, he's saying he can only be with her if she doesn't act unwisely by choosing to put her life in danger.

      You can dictate to an extent, and you can also request, which is what he's doing.
      So are you saying you can't tell your partner to not have sex with other people? And if they do have sex, the person is wrong for leaving them?

Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • Communicate your feelings to her. That's all you really can do.

  • Unfortunately, she can make her own choices. You don't have to agree with them, but you have to recognize her agency as a person.

    • Yes, it is true. But what if she doesn't realize that it is ruining her, and I just dont want to stand there and watch?

    • If you don't want to stand there and watch, you break up with her.

What Guys Said 1

  • She isn't the one for you bro. It's not fair she upsets you like this on purpose.