When I met him he had a nice house in another city. After a few months, he decided to move to my city so we could spend more time together (his parents live here too). He told me and his mom to look for an apartment for him. We did so, spent ages looking and found the perfect one.
When we told him that, he said that he doesn't wanna rent anything and want to live with his parents... His explanation is that he doesn't want to have to pay rent, electricity, wifi etc. Note that he's been paying for that for over a decade.
I'm sorry, but I just can't deal with that. t's not that I'm a gold digger - I've got my own place. But I'm dating an older guy for specific reasons: maturity, security independency. Emphasis on *MATURITY*. And he tells me that at this point of his life he wants to live like an 18 year old?
I don't know what to do or what to say. I'm pissed, don't approve his decision at all and don't want to date a teenager.
Most Helpful Guy
Wait a minute. You might be overseas for a year? So what does it matter. Why should he waste his money on a place. He could easily give some money to his folks to help out and save for the future. Savings for when he has a family or down payment on a home for said family.
Sounds like he's thinking maturely and while you're not. It's like you're more angry at the possibility of telling people your boyfriend lives at home. He could care less about that stigma that, that carries. Seems like he has a well paying job and is looking for towards the future.
If anything, you don't sound like you should be in a relationship right now. A year away studying overseas? I don't see this working out if you're going a ballistic over this small bs.
The avg. home sells for half-a-million here in SD. That makes for quite the down-payment that most have to save for a long time for.1
Most Helpful Girl
Well, if he doesn't want to rent does that mean that he wants to save up money to buy a house? If so, that is reasonable. He obviously has a job that allows him to afford his last place, so he has that going for him. To an extent I can see where he is coming from, I always think it would be great to move back home and not pay bills and be a kid again, but that could and would never actually happen! It is immature to actually do it at this point in his life and I would tell him that this is not the person or situation you signed up for and maybe give him an ultimatum that he moves out within the year or else you will find someone with their life together.1