Did I screw it?

Not a date actually. He cold approached me on Saturday at a market, exchanged details, on Sunday we met up, drink, quick dinner, then made out at his place. We felt a connection. He would call or text me in the morning/at lunch break/before bed. Two days later we did a workout together as scheduled. After that he suggested we go to his place for a shower and hangout a bit. I refused because I didn't plan like this, I was wearing my workout clothes and didn't bring anything to change or to shower, all I thought was maybe a dinner together outside. He suggested I go to his place n don't have to shower. I said no.. again. Then he got really turned off and not interested in me, told me next time when I like a guy I should go with the flow. It was bad communication cuz there was no explanation from me. I felt butterflies for this guy and now I feel like I screwed it but I have no idea if it's me or it's cultural thing, we are from different backgrounds, he's open and experienced while I'm not. Did I screw our chance? I think he won't see me or contact me again. I was really into him and now feeling stupid.. confused, and frustrated.


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • I think a decent, stable guy isn't going to suddenly change his attitude over one small thing, especially when that thing concerned whether you felt comfortable (I mean that he should take care for you to be comfortable with any potentially intimate situation).

    I actually wonder if he wanted something easy and fun. He loved it as long as there were no hurdles, then he fell at the first one.

    But you know the situation, I might have it wrong. If you think he's worth it, well, you've said that you didn't explain properly why you were saying no? How about you explain? Keep it concise, just straightforwardly say what you were thinking, and that you are excited to keep seeing him!

    • Thank you for the advice, that's really comforting. However the problem is he thinks I'm too scared and uptight all the time and it's strange for him, so I guess there's nothing much to do to get him back. So I'll just let go:)

    • I'm sure you've made the best decision possible - well done and best wishes!

What Girls Said 1

  • It doesn't matter. He sounds sort of controlling, so I don't think you missed anything great. Chin up, better things will come along.