He disappears at night?

From about the time he gets off work (4:30) until 9 or 10 at night, he doesn't text me. I'll get messages right before he goes to bed, but during that time, nothing.

Like today. He text me at 10 a. m. because he never answered my text late last night and I replied at 2:30 p. m. He still hasn't replied and part of his response will be what time he's coming over tomorrow.

Usually I don't let things get to me, but it's almost 9 p. m. on a Friday night. This shit is getting old.

He's really sweet, shy, and really seems to be into me, but I don't understand what the hell he does when he gets off work until he goes to sleep and why he never messages me during that time.

Do you not think it's a bit odd or off? Really makes me think that us deleting our OKCupid accounts (he did first) was stupid because I have other guys that actually want to talk to me and don't disappear all the time.

I hate that I feel this way.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Have you tried asking him? Communicate with him. That's the only way you'll figure any of this out.

    • I don't know how to bring it up without sounding like I'm being ridiculous. It's really causing me to retreat back into my shell and not want to be vulnerable with this guy.

    • Show All
    • We talked! He was taking forever to talk to me because he was afraid of coming off as clingy (I had said something about clingy guys in an early conversation.) I told him to text me anytime he wanted. He said it made him feel relieved because talking to me was the highlight of his day.

      We also ironed out exclusivity. He said he wanted to be honest about talking to two other women and that he wanted to stop and only talk to me, but didn't know where I stood. I asked if he was afraid of being vulnerable and that's why he hadn't stopped talking to the others? He said yes, he didn't want to be more invested than me and potentially kicked to the curb. We agreed to not talk to others and to take it slow before we decided to be in a relationship. We wanted to be exclusive and said he only wanted me. But, he respected that though I really like him, I want to be sure before we dive into a relationship. He expressed he really loved we could talk.

      It's all about communication, isn't it?

    • Hey, congratulations! Communication is always key. Best of luck!

What Guys Said 0

The only opinion from guys was selected the Most Helpful Opinion!

What Girls Said 2

  • maybe he is busy or tired or sleeps early.

  • You're being super paranoid.