I don't know if my crush wants to date me or just be friends, he is so confusing?

Me and this guy have been friends since the beginning of the year. We just recently started looking at each other differently and we both started to catch feelings. I have low-key always found him attractive but never said anything. So after a few weeks of flirting and touching each other, I decided to tell him how I felt and he said " I don't know i do like you, and did have the same feelings but i don't know how to feel because i don't want to possibly ruin our friendship" so we both agreed to see where this goes. So we gave it almost a week and he still flirted some days but some days he didn't. I told him towards the end of the week that i don't want to waste my time if he isn't interested, and he said " i don't want to waste your time, i do like you its just if we happened to brake up i don't want our friendship to be ruined or our other friends in the group to hate me" i said i agree. So then i texted him saying we should just be friends and just not jeopardize our friendship. But then the very next day he starts flirting with me and touching me, rubbing my back and looking at my lips. He is so damn confusing, and i like him a lot but i just don't know what he wants. I also think his past relationship has something to do with it seeing as him and his ex were best friends forever. They recently decided to date, but then they broke up because she looked at him as a brother, and she cheated on him, he was heart broken but apparently it was a mutual decision. Please help! I have a party with him tomorrow so what should i tell him?

The day after we agreed to just be friends he also told one of our friends that he still likes me. But again said he is afraid of hurting the friendship.


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What Guys Said 1

  • 1 you both like each other your old friendship is over and it won't be like that again. 2 get him outside of your guy's normal hangout area. 3 at the party touch him up, not sexually but be touch, kiss him if the opportunity arises. 4 The friendship is over your now both really like each other and have told each other.5 show him that you have his back. try and get a freind on his case and you defend him. Just don't go to overboard with it. A small argument will do. 6 Understand that he is really scared of the pain from his last betrayal. I had two close friends betray me and it has taken me a while to overcome it emotionally. it is more along the lines of a phobia than a fear because you can't overcome it you have to work through it.


What Girls Said 1

  • He's feeling hesitant because of how things ended with his ex. He's flirting with you because he's attracted you and he like you. Just because he decided to stay just friends doesn't mean those romantic feelings will magically disappear. My best advice is to talk to him again. Let him know you understand the bullshit you went through with his ex, but you're not her and you can't be responsible for her actions. Let him know you appreciate your friendship but connecting with someone like this happens too infrequently to just pass it up. Also, a friendship can only be ruined if you LET it be ruined. I say talk to him again, and see if he's willing to trust you and try again. :)

    • This! If he was older I'd say he wasn't really interested if he kept repeating the "I don't want to ruin the friendship line"... But he is a 17/18-year old boy who's been friends with you for a long time and he did go through a bad break up (his first break up I'm guessing) with a girl who used to be his friend. So I agree with dreamingcake on this.