So my boyfriend and I have been dating for six months and he knows perfectly well that I don't intend on having sex until after marriage. But that doesn't mean that I don't occasionally like to get his imagination going in that direction lol :P We obviously do a lot of heavy making out and other things but I never let it cross the line into anything beyond that. But he called me a tease the other day and I was upset by the comment because I'm really not trying to be and I'm just doing what I know is right for me. We're both extremely committed to each other and I know he respects my decision to abstain from sex but what would make him say something like that? Is he just saying that to get in my head or does he really think I'm just playing with his emotions? I swear that's not the case because I truly love him & I would never intentionally hurt him or toy with his emotions like that. Why would make a guy call a girl a tease? Please let me know and I feel really guilty that he sees me in this way :( Thanks for answering!
Most Helpful Guy
He loves you, he wants to be very physical with you or at least a little. He is becoming sexually frustrated to a point where literally any physical interaction would be greatly appreciated.
If I had to guess, "I was upset by the comment because I'm really not trying to be and I'm just doing what I know is right for me" really means he's making you feel uncomfortable about you're life decision which there could of course be many reasons for.
He knows you're not playing with his emotions, deep down, you probably know too. But at the end of the day he doesn't seem to want to wait until marriage.
You have a lot of thinking to do. Starting with whether or not you really love this person and whether or not he loves you. Then you should ask yourself why you want to wait for marriage, and if it actually makes sense or accomplishes anything.0
Most Helpful Girl
First of all, this is my personal opinion. I cannot get upset with your boyfriend if your the one agreeing to heavy make out sessions with him, or get him to lust after you but you expect him to 'respect' your decisions in waiting till marriage. It's not going to work. This is why men often bounce, because your getting their hopes up for something they feel they'll never get from you. This not only bruises the male ego, it is also psychologically damaging to both partners. Causing a male get sexually frustrated is not a pretty picture. And he is being completely honest with you because you are not only teasing him, but this leads to abuse of power. Because say if you do get married to him and you waited. What do you think is going to happen if you continue that behavior? It'll lead to arguments, resentment, cheating, a sexless marriage and then divorce. Why? Because you caused it. He does think your playing with his emotions, especially if he reacted negatively towards it. If not, he will eventually. I suggest that you stop getting very physical with him if you are truly looking to wait for marriage. Otherwise this is not going to work, and you will eventually end up having sex with him because he can't or refuses to control himself. And when you think you have control, your going to that you don't and never did. It will not only make you both miserable, but at some point he is going to want to start looking else where. This is how cheating, sexless marriages and divorce come into play. Remember, what you do before marriage will effect you when your married.
I know this, because this a mistake my friend made before she just recently got married to her now husband when she was with her ex. It masked a lot of emotional abuse and problems. And it not only made her miserable, she had to get therapy for nearly 3 months because of it. You don't want any guilt or hurt him, don't do this. I can't tell you what to do, but I will guarantee you every penny, nickel and dime I have. You will regret it. If you two want to have sex that badly, get married then. Don't waste months and years just to commit to something that will never last.0