I found out my boyfriend moved 2 1/2 hours away without telling me. I don't know how to feel about it?

We've been dating for 7 months and he stayed with his sister... but she moved to Texas and he was "homeless" but he was staying with his friends. He has a job in Kalamazoo... I understand that he moved closer to his job but I feel weird because he didn't tell me. I found out because I had to wire him money. He asked me if I wanted to have his kids and I actually thought I would like to have a family with him. But I just don't know what to do.

We really don't have a way to see each other, I don't drive or have my own place and he's the same. I don't feel safe taking a bus, especially by myself.

What should I do?


Most Helpful Girl

  • I think it's a bit immature he didn't at least talk about this with you.
    I mean obviously the situation could probably not have been helped with the whole sister move and work etc. But at what point in your conversations and phone calls did he not think to mention "oh by the way.. I have to move.. going this weekend" or whatever.
    To not find out UNTIL he's moved is pathetic. He had the time he thought about it, the time he was packing, the 2.5 hour trip there etc to talk to you. And to tell you by asking for money? Is highly selfish.

    It makes it hard obviously for your relationship. And you should ask him to put some thought into solutions because he's the one who up and moved. But you'll just have to put thought into how you'll do it. Get a car? Buses/trains?

    My SO and I live 2.5 hours apart and I drive there every weekend (aka been here like the last 2 weeks ha) and we're talking about renting a place in a few months together. You TALK about these things.

    Communication is numero uno in a relationship. Everything else stems on talking to each other and he failed that.


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What Girls Said 2

  • I would feel weird as well and slightly lied to I mean who doesn't tell their partner that theyre moving, moving is actually a huge thing and can impact a relationship.. In general buses should be safe but it sucks you don't have a car, you can try car pooling people do that on craigslist or something like that but like i said you're better off on a bus. It can only work if you two want to make it work.

    • Every time I go on a bus there is always some creepy person staring at me and it makes me uncomfortable. And I don't trust those ads on Craigslist.

    • Carry a pocket knife or something. make sure you have your phone.

  • I don't like to judge guys that have to live with other people but he seems very unprepared to even think of starting to make a family. Both you and he have a lot of growing to do. And he's borrowing money from you after only 7 months? I think you really need to consider if this is the path you really want to take. Do you really want to attach yourself to a guy that can't even take care of himself, let alone you or any children you have? Moving around and never knowing if you're going to have a place to sleep the next night? Relying on your friends for help? Living in a car?

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