How di I know when it's gone from hanging out to dating to a relationship without just asking?

I just had my third date with a girl I met. For the first two dates nothing was ever actually said whether it was actually a date or just spending time together, each lasted just a few hours. It was one of my few first dates involving kissing.

The third date was quite a bit more involved, went to her place and I fixed dinner on the grill. A lot of talking went on, where we both had the same viewpoint of only dating one person at a time. It was really the first time we referred to the time together as "dates", but both saw it as our third date. When discussing things we like to do, we would talk about adding it to our list of things we will do next. This was the evening we talked a lot more about our pasts, sexual things were also discussed. We didn't have sex, but I ended up staying overnight, and a lot more talking the next morning.

It has occurred to me that in my life, the whole relationship thing just seemed to happen with whoever I was seeing in the past, but that's been years ago. It would seem weird to me to have a talk about it, so just really wonder when you would consider what it is


Most Helpful Girl

  • The only way to know is to ask/talk about it. Trust me, it's a lot less painful/confusing if you guys just lay your cards on the table.

    • Makes sense, I really haven't said anything at this point because I have felt it's been too early. Though we haven't set the next date yet, I have considered talking about it.

    • You don't have to decide to be exclusive. By talk/ask I meant as her at what point she would like that sort of relationship. If it's too soon she will tell you. And if it's too soon for you, just tell her but also be sure to let her know that you are wanting the relationship to end up there eventually.

    • One of the things we both talked about was that neither of us were seeing anyone else and that neither of us believe in dating more than one person. I am already fairly certain that she is hoping things go that way, so yes, I think you are right about just figuring out when.

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What Girls Said 3

  • If you don't specify it's a date, then there's always the risk that it'll be viewed as a hangout. But by the sounds of it the two of you were aware they were dates.

    It isn't a relationship until you two discuss it and make it exclusive.

  • I wouldn't consider it official until the both of us have talked about it and decided that we're official.

  • I think you have to talk to her to see where she's at and where you're at. talking is key!


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