Do I make more effort, or should I move on?

I really like this guy that i've been dating. Its been just over a year and a half. We met while i was in the US, i live in the UK. We were meant to have "the talk" last year when he planned to come here, but with work comittments, he never came. I've been back the US twice since, but we still haven't had that talk. I figured if he wanted to, he would have addressed it, since it was me who suggested we have it in the first place. When im in the UK, we can go weeks without speaking, but when im there its different. Its not just about sex when im with him either. He has spoken about having dreams that i have his baby. Im fairly emotionally guarded, and reluctant to put myself out there to raise the subject again. I kind of believe if he wanted more he would say so. I dont want to regret not trying harder, but i dont want to look a fool either. Advice please?


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What Guys Said 1

  • It must be hard with that distance, are you planning on moving to the USA one day or him moving there? Sounds like a tuff choice since one of you will need to move to the others place and start a new job

    • I would consider moving there, yes. I have thought about applying for a work visa, despite our relationship, as its a central place for work opportunities for me anyway. But yes - the distance is tough, especially when we dont talk all the time

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    • Yeah that's true but since I have been there and I noticed people are more guarded there like you said so maybe he is waiting for you to say something instead. Looks like you two need to seriously have the talk

    • It all comes down to what your gut is telling you, you need to weigh the pro and cons of it, can you see yourself with this person always is what it boils down to

What Girls Said 1

  • he would have already had the talk with you if he really wanted to. He's just not that into you. Don't listen to him when he does all those sweet baby talking. It could mean nothing. He could be a player say the same things to other girls. Try to judge him by his action, behavior towards you.
    If he really cared, liked you, he couldn't go weeks without speaking to you when you in the UK.
    I would just move on.. Apparently he's giving you this doubt now. If you really liked this guy and really want to try for the last time, just ask him and tell him how you feel next time you see him.
    But honestly if this is how he's been treating you, you deserve better..