Beyond knowing what to do?

Literally like two days ago I started talking to one of my Facebook friends. I had met him at my friend Taylor's birthday party. It started out of boredom but we were flirting up a storm and continued it through texts. My friend found out we've been talking and thinks we should get together.

I laughed it off but he didn't. Now he wants me to come hang out at her house for the weekend. She lives like an hour away though. So I'd end up spending the night. I don't know what she said to him but now he's trying to convince me to see them. I wouldn't mind if it weren't for the fact that him and my friends boyfriend plan on staying the night at her house too.

My mom freaked the last time I tried to spend the night at someone's house and guys were there. I know I could just lie but I also know she probably knows its more than just going to see my friend. She doesn't have a problem with me dating, thank god.

Another thing is that last night he mentioned that 'something might happen'. What this is I'm not sure but he sure as hell wasn't talking about meatballs falling from the sky. I know I should be happy that the guys probably willing to give it a shot but I'm almost (I can't believe I'm going to say this) scared.

I've never had a good relationship or anything even remotely close to a fling. I'm no prude though.

So here's what I need help deciding.

Do I go and see how things play out?

Should I go and let them know I'm not sure about the whole guys-spending-the-night-thing?

Do I ask if they wanna meet halfway instead?

Or any other course of actions I can take?


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  • I'm glad you're not seriously considering lying to your mom. Don't, parents, especially mothers have a way of finding these things out.

    You need to talk to her. Maybe what you can do is go to your friend's house and hang out for the whole day and well into the night. Tell your mom that you respect her wishes and do not intend on sleeping over with guys present, but you still want to go and hang out. Hopefully, your mom will find you mature and offer to pick you up sometime after 11 PM, giving you adequate time to see where things go with your crush. And the halfway idea works great too, just see how it goes. You can be honest with your friends and put the 'blame' on your mom, saying she won't let you stay the night so they don't think you're uncomfortable with it.

    I don't advise you going to your friend's house and stay overnight when there will be guys present. A co-ed sleepover at your age isn't really the best thing to be doing. You could wind up doing something you'll regret and you don't want to go too far since you have very little experience. You could get caught up in the moment, I've been there.

    Don't go with any expectations. You say you've never had a fling before or a normal relationship - those are two completely different relationships on the spectrum. Just go and have fun and don't do anything more than kissing, and only kissing after you've been talking and getting to know this guy more and want to pursue a possible relationship with him.

    Good luck.

    • The caught up in the moment is pretty much what I'm afraid of. I don't want to royally screw things up and that's part of it too. I'm hoping to try and talk them into meeting at a mall halfway for the day. If we're at the mall I won't have to worry about things going to far

    • The mall is a great idea. You definitely won't go too far physically there.

      If you're not ready and scared about going out with him and getting caught up in the moment, you probably shouldn't. It's okay to not be ready, you have time. You don't just have to go out and try and find yourself a boyfriend because everyone else is. That's why Teen Mom on MTV exists, because girls made stupid decisions at a young age.