Why doesn't he just accept to break up?

We have been in a long distance relationship for over a year. Due to the distance, we don't see each other much, but we take turn to visit each other every few month.

To keep it short, i'm always the talkative one and like to keep the communication going. He often uses the lame excuse that he is too busy to text. So last week, he went without texting for 2 days. I told him that i just saw him online not long ago and commenting on some shitty posts. He was angry that i would "spy" on him, which was not fair as it showed on facebook for me to see. Anyhow, i told him if he can't spare even a minute a day just to send me a "how are you" text, let's call it off. He said i was acting like a kid and that he would call me to talk properly tomorrow. The call tomorrow turned out to be a text a few days after saying he needs time to think about what he wants/needs to do and he hopes i would understand and give him time. I told him there's no point to think whether he wants to be with me or not. A long distance relationship requires more communications than a normal one as we don't get to see each other much. We discussed about moving closer and he didn't make any effort at his end (finding information on work and visa matters) which i did in case he would move to be close to me. I don't want to waste time on someone that is not sure if he wants to be with me or not. Again "too busy" is a lame excuse. I am busy too but i always have time to text as he is one of the priorities. Some friends told me he just wants time to fuck around and weigh other options, some said to give him the time he needs. I am worried by the time he makes the effort to contact, it is too late because i'm already hurt.

I already offer to break up and he doesn't want to, he just asks for a couple of days to think.

What should i do?


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • End it

    • Love is built on compassion, support, and understanding. If he calls you immature or ouy rightly criticize you, it's no good. I would drop him plus distant is no fun. Up to you whether you think its worth it. Lot of time and energy goes into a relationship and i wouldn't like it if i'm not in control of my own emotions especially if someone is affecting them and not even realizing it.

    • Thanks, thats what i thought too but then some people said if he's serious about me, he would need time to think. I really don't understand how guys think, too complicated

What Girls Said 1

  • He's clearly using you. If he met someone else he would have replaced you already.
    It's not up to him. If you want to break up, it's your own choice. End it.

    • It's true. However partly i want to break up, partly i don't. I trust him enough to know he's not the cheating kind, however i don't want to accept to be contacted only when he feels fit or "not busy". Who can be too busy for a text?

    • If he truly loved you, he would have made an effort. It's not that hard to text someone.

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