Okay so here's the breakdown. There are two halves to focus on. Half one you've got down! Women love a man who can father a child. I know that watching my boyfriend be an older brother is a HUGE turn on. BUT part two is all about normality! Being able to take her out and hang with her one on one WITHOUT mention of her child. Taking away the motherly side of her and letting her see you care about more than just that. Balance those two and you'll be fine!!
Food stamps. Only joking. I dunno, what difference does it make she's a mom? Just treat her like a normal person and she either likes you or she doesn't. I wouldn't hold out much hope to be honest, you're kinda creeping me out a little bit so good luck with that.
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Anonymous
(36-45)
+1 y
Talk to her like she's a human being. Get to know her. Right now you're building up a data st that she's a certain way. She may or may not be. Listen to her sincerely, share things about yourself. See if you click and get along.
Also, you can't trade favors for sex they way you suggest at the end. Human sexuality doesn't work that way. Once a relationship is established, creating a space to be sexy, despite responsibilities of parenthood, is more likely to develop a sexy relationship.
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Opinion Owner
+1 y
that should say fantasy, not data set. Same notion, though...
The package may look good on the outside but remember, the goods inside never run out. There will always be added burdens, and her top priority is always going to be this child. Go slow right now. Try and be her friend at first. She may have a problem in letting anyone in her circle because she is a mother hen who is very protect-ant of her chick. It could take some time and then again, she might never bite.
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
Just get her kid on side or tell her she's an amazing mother and her kid is lucky to have her. Once her kid likes you, it's finished, she'll love you. And kids are easy to make like you. Well, that's a very sly way some guys do it. Otherwise, getting her is like like getting any other girl. You just need to be able to draw her in, build q connection and strike at the right time not leaving it too long.
little kids are easy to get to like you, older kids it can be harder.
For instance, my little brother likes everyone, my sister likes most people, though she's beginning to be able to see through people's bullshit, and I don't like most people. Once a kid get's older, especially one who's had a lot of people that they've gotten close to come and go, they're gonna develope attachment or trust issues.
@FallOutBoy2001 I think maybe teens, but under 11s are usually really easy. Sometimes it takes a couple of meetings, not first time, but it'll happen. Older kids/teens is a bit different I guess. Then you have to be more genuine and actually be able to talk to them and stuff. I think your age is probably one of the hardest, til like 18 maybe... just from what I remember with my older brothers girlfriends and me and my younger siblings. That was ages ago though lol old.
I really like how humble some people are... Striving to be number 2 because you know you can't be number 1... It's true what they say, ambition is the enemy of success 😂 Anyways, stop being a creep and focus on her not on her being a single mom and get to know her first. Oh my these kids these days!
Any man worth his salt won't be #2 to anything. Especially, most especially a kid who isn't his. To me that's settling and I won't do it. Fuck buddy or a friends with benefits perhaps. Nothing more. It's not worth the drama and hassles.
You have to be interested in her kid. Not in a creepy way, though, and don't expect to meet said kid for quite some time. You also have to not sweat the small stuff, because you aren't ever going to be her top priority. Also, she's not going to have the kind of time a woman who isn't a single mother has, and you have to deal with that.
You are a Beta male that has issues. You need to become a man. Dating a single mother will ruin your life. She got pumped and dumped by who she is attracted to. Now a real man won’t have her but you are trying to win her by kissing her ass and being dad to her kid? Grow up you need counseling and a father figure. She will never love you, she will cheat with guys she wants because they would never do anything to her except screw her and that’s about what she’s good for
I have given up on single moms atm. Too many complications, sometimes they have a lot of baggage, their children / child are/is way more important which I can understand, but not when it's excessive etc.
@JRICHARDS1996 I'd either have his visiting rights taken away by court order or I'd avoid to put myself in any situation I'd have to cope with more persons than the woman and the child. If that isn't possible, I'd move on.
Good luck... But if and, probably, when things don't work out, just don't put he skank on blast and make some dumb take about how you got fucked over cause things simply didn't work out 😑
well you said you don't have sex with sluts.. so you are really contradictory if you consider a slut a girl that sleeps around or have sex, you basically wants to date one
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Okay so here's the breakdown. There are two halves to focus on. Half one you've got down! Women love a man who can father a child. I know that watching my boyfriend be an older brother is a HUGE turn on. BUT part two is all about normality! Being able to take her out and hang with her one on one WITHOUT mention of her child. Taking away the motherly side of her and letting her see you care about more than just that. Balance those two and you'll be fine!!
Food stamps. Only joking. I dunno, what difference does it make she's a mom? Just treat her like a normal person and she either likes you or she doesn't. I wouldn't hold out much hope to be honest, you're kinda creeping me out a little bit so good luck with that.
Talk to her like she's a human being. Get to know her. Right now you're building up a data st that she's a certain way. She may or may not be. Listen to her sincerely, share things about yourself. See if you click and get along.
Also, you can't trade favors for sex they way you suggest at the end. Human sexuality doesn't work that way. Once a relationship is established, creating a space to be sexy, despite responsibilities of parenthood, is more likely to develop a sexy relationship.
that should say fantasy, not data set. Same notion, though...
The package may look good on the outside but remember, the goods inside never run out. There will always be added burdens, and her top priority is always going to be this child.
Go slow right now. Try and be her friend at first. She may have a problem in letting anyone in her circle because she is a mother hen who is very protect-ant of her chick. It could take some time and then again, she might never bite.
Just get her kid on side or tell her she's an amazing mother and her kid is lucky to have her. Once her kid likes you, it's finished, she'll love you. And kids are easy to make like you.
Well, that's a very sly way some guys do it.
Otherwise, getting her is like like getting any other girl. You just need to be able to draw her in, build q connection and strike at the right time not leaving it too long.
little kids are easy to get to like you, older kids it can be harder.
For instance, my little brother likes everyone, my sister likes most people, though she's beginning to be able to see through people's bullshit, and I don't like most people. Once a kid get's older, especially one who's had a lot of people that they've gotten close to come and go, they're gonna develope attachment or trust issues.
@FallOutBoy2001 I think maybe teens, but under 11s are usually really easy. Sometimes it takes a couple of meetings, not first time, but it'll happen. Older kids/teens is a bit different I guess. Then you have to be more genuine and actually be able to talk to them and stuff. I think your age is probably one of the hardest, til like 18 maybe... just from what I remember with my older brothers girlfriends and me and my younger siblings. That was ages ago though lol old.
I really like how humble some people are... Striving to be number 2 because you know you can't be number 1... It's true what they say, ambition is the enemy of success 😂
Anyways, stop being a creep and focus on her not on her being a single mom and get to know her first. Oh my these kids these days!
Any man worth his salt won't be #2 to anything. Especially, most especially a kid
who isn't his. To me that's settling and I won't do it. Fuck buddy or a friends with benefits perhaps.
Nothing more. It's not worth the drama and hassles.
lol "single mothers are so mature". then why can't they stay married? Maturity is COMPROMISE, patience, efforts toward peace.
most single mothers are not mature at all-that's how they became single.
You have to be interested in her kid. Not in a creepy way, though, and don't expect to meet said kid for quite some time. You also have to not sweat the small stuff, because you aren't ever going to be her top priority. Also, she's not going to have the kind of time a woman who isn't a single mother has, and you have to deal with that.
All I see is ''Single mother, single mother, single mother, single mother'' try treating her as an individual instead of a ''Single mother''.
How well do you know her? Don't try and win her heart over if you just want to see her in a thong.
You are a Beta male that has issues. You need to become a man. Dating a single mother will ruin your life. She got pumped and dumped by who she is attracted to. Now a real man won’t have her but you are trying to win her by kissing her ass and being dad to her kid? Grow up you need counseling and a father figure. She will never love you, she will cheat with guys she wants because they would never do anything to her except screw her and that’s about what she’s good for
I have given up on single moms atm. Too many complications, sometimes they have a lot of baggage, their children / child are/is way more important which I can understand, but not when it's excessive etc.
Don't offer to babysit
That just comes across as creepy.
And what about the guy who knocked her up? If he's still in the picture he (and his mom) can be a terrible PITA.
He is inconsistent. Sometimes he shows up for the daughter while other times he is nowhere to be found.
You'll have to think about how you can cope with him.
You're an old man who presumably has a lot of experience. How would you cope with him?
@JRICHARDS1996 I'd either have his visiting rights taken away by court order or I'd avoid to put myself in any situation I'd have to cope with more persons than the woman and the child.
If that isn't possible, I'd move on.
why would you ever want to win over a single mom? W.. T.. F?
dude dont do it. just dont do it. i forbid you to do it as an older wiser gentlemen.
So you think YOU'RE Older And Wiser? :)
@OlderAndWiser no sr, hats all you.
thats
Based on your tract record, there's no way this ends well
Probably not, but I can still try. Besides, she is not from work. So it is not as dangerous this time.
Good luck... But if and, probably, when things don't work out, just don't put he skank on blast and make some dumb take about how you got fucked over cause things simply didn't work out 😑
well you said you don't have sex with sluts.. so you are really contradictory
if you consider a slut a girl that sleeps around or have sex, you basically wants to date one
lol dude no doesn't work like that
lets say you do get her she won't like you
like that
you are the replacement
I can't wait until you write your next series of butthurt articles after being rejected.
I would highly advise against dating a single mother, period. Save yourself the heart ache.
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