Should I pursue her even though she told me she wants to "hang out as friends"?

When I first met her she would keep staring at me. I actually screwed up and called her on it, "hey why are you always staring at me?" I'm a counsellor in real-life so I'm used to calling people out... Now, I realize she took that as a sign I'm not interested in her. Other things, she would always pay attention when I would say something around her and would laugh at my silly jokes. Somehow we always find a way to sit close to each other in meetings and things like that. When we are with other people she keeps very quiet (shy?), and talking to her is kinda awkward, but when we are by ourselves she gets very animated and is not shy at all.

So, I texted her the other day and I remember this comment she said to me about wanting to meet people from the area, which she did in front of this other girl who's from this area whereas I'm still new to the area (she kinda ignored the other girl, is my point). Usually she takes some 10 or 20 minutes to answer texts but when I asked her if she would like to hang out she replied right away. I proposed an activity and she liked it (answered right away too). the next day she texts me saying she doesn't want "to make things weird, but wants to clarify we are hanging out as friends and it's not a date." I'm probably over thinking this, I just feel there were so many signs she was interested in me that maybe I should still pursue her? Like she stills asks me personal questions (do I have a house, my type of education, etc.). So I feel she is giving me hints still... Just need some outsider advice.


Most Helpful Girl

  • Don't overthink it any further. If she doesn't want anything with you, play the same game as her. Also, let her know and show you respect her. Don't go completely out of your way to respond to her or to see her if she's not willing to let you go any further than friends. By turning the tables, she will then wonder why you stopped pursuing her, which may lead her to pursue you. If she doesn't text you wondering why you never replied or didn't check in with her, she's not interested.


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What Girls Said 1

  • Yes. Keep pursuing her (slowly). She's not sure if she wants to date you just yet. And maybe she probably thought she was doing a little too much so she pulled back a little. Don't give up!


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