Guys: Why is it that it takes a year or 2, until you realize that you actually want to date the girl that you once didn't take seriously?

scenario 1:

I have known this guy since 2014. 2014 and 2015, he never really took me seriously. We were friends with benefits and he would disappear on me and not tell me where I stood with him but I know that he was dating other girls. I was basically the side chic. Just last year, after I showed him what I don't put up with, it seems he started to value me more. He kept apologizing to me while I kept ignoring him. I didn't become cordial with him just up until this month in 2016. He has completely changed, and seems more serious about me and is actually asking me on a date. Funny how the tables have changed, because now I could care less, but all of sudden he's become a gentleman and wants to actually date me.

Scenario 2:
my college bestie is in the same situation. To make it short, she really loved this guy so much and even got pregnant with him. Before her pregnancy, he was being such a douche to her. Now that she has a baby from him and has moved on emotionally from the baby daddy, the baby daddy actually wants to be a part of her life again, and is trying hard to make it work with her. She tells me how shock she is because she is now fine without him but is willing to start over from scratch.


Most Helpful Guy

  • It's not that it takes long. It's that we might have had other obligations or desires in that moment. And later when the person finally slips to the top of the list cause their first and second choices failed... thats where you come in

    • Wow okay lol. So now that he's courting me and all that, does this mean because I'm the only one left at the moment?

    • Lol yes it happens a lot actually

    • I dunno for sure. But it happens a lot a lot

Most Helpful Girl

  • I think its just naturally that sometimes when guys screw up they realised that they lost something that they actually really want or need


Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • He didn't take you seriously because you were friends with benefits. If you wanted a relationship with him you should've never gone down that path to begin with.

    Also, it's "couldn't care less".

    • I remember asking him that I wanted more but he won't give me a straight answer. Now that we are friends on FB, I looked back at his pictures on the times we were "dating" and there's another girl in the picture- that explained it all.

What Girls Said 1

  • because a lot of guys only want what they can't have. you made it too easy in the beginning by being fbuddies and now in the end you made it more challenging. thus the chase is on. nothing worth having comes easy.

    • Ok so what made him change his opinion about me then? The fact that I didn't put up with his BS back then?

    • yeah that's probably it. maybe he respects you more now that you're not putting up with his crap now.

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